


Price of Love

by pjlover666, Skylar_Matthews



Category: The Transformers (Cartoon Generation One), Transformers - All Media Types, Transformers Generation One
Genre: Doorwings, Kink, M/M, Medical Condition, Prostitution, Prowl is in a bad place, Seeker, Starblaze, Starblaze is a sociopath, dub con, immobile kink, or their lack, sedatives
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-02
Updated: 2020-01-02
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:27:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 24,204
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22087876
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pjlover666/pseuds/pjlover666, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skylar_Matthews/pseuds/Skylar_Matthews
Summary: After a bad accident Prowl loses his door-wings in Iacon. However as a Praxian, he needs them to stay /sane/. Sadly he and Jazz can't afford to pay for the operation so Jazz makes the difficult decision how to make credits, and fast. There, he meets a seeker that will change his life - for better or for worse.Originally written 2017
Relationships: Jazz (Transformers)/Original Character(s), Jazz/Prowl, Jazz/Starblaze
Comments: 4
Kudos: 31





	Price of Love

**Author's Note:**

> Wohooo! So happy to finally introduce Starblaze to everyone! 
> 
> He is a very... interesting character. Originally, he was created around 4 years ago in an old fic of ours (which we haven't posted) and his goal was to be a villain. And we mean that in the most literal way - Starblaze in that fic wasn't a good mech and up till this day we debate his character development there. 
> 
> Ever since then pjlover developed an obsession with him and he started occasionally appearing in our fics, always somewhere in the gray area between a 'good character' and a 'bad character'. There's a term for it: anti-hero. 
> 
> There was such chemistry between Starblaze and Jazz, it surprised both authors.
> 
> Finally, we get to share him with you. 
> 
> ps:I couldn't help myself and created his very own tag. :D Also, at the end of the fic you can see a commission of him in his non-seeker form from the extremely talented InMoNochrome (originally he isn't a seeker)
> 
> Also one last warning - dubious content ahead! You are warned.

  
Jazz was in the middle of grocery shopping when he got another message. A part of him was… glad to see it was from a name he already knew. Had it finally really passed that much time that he was starting to get regulars? Was he starting to make a name for him own? That was both good and it wasn’t good.   
  
It was good, because the reputation was bringing him more clients, some of which were really giving him good credits. It was bad because in this business, it was never good to be on your own. But Jazz would be damned if someone told him who and when, and took his credits.  
  
Absently, Jazz mused if he should get the ingredients for the extra bitter goodies. It’s not like they would be eaten anyway. But… still, maybe… maybe they will be, this time. Determined to make the goodies before his next client, Jazz purchased the ingredients and hurried home to make them. His mate was thankfully recharging this time and Jazz set them to bake in record time. Not that long ago, their apartment used to always smell of fresh goodies. Hopefully, it would be like that soon again.   
  
Jazz went to the living room as the goodies baked and pulled out a data pad. After unlocking it with his passcode Jazz scanned the credits on it – his workpad. It contained detailed information for all the mechs he had seen, when and how credits he had made. He had barely scratched the surface of one third of the sum he needed but it was still much faster if he had kept his job in the café.   
  
Jazz glanced in the direction of the berthroom, concerned. But it’s not like his mate would notice his hectic work joors. Just… just a couple of vorns. Just a few more vorns and Jazz would reach his goal. Nothing would stop him from achieving it. No amount of self-hate or guilt – he didn’t care. Jazz couldn’t remember when he had been more determined in his life than this.  
  
Plus, tonight he would make a good amount of credits. Jazz preferred kinkers – they always had to pay extra and this one especially. Plus, Jazz barely did with this one anything so it suited him fine.  
  
After a quick shower, the goodies were finally done and Jazz easily relocated them in the berth room, on the night stand next to his mate, curled up in recharge. Jazz couldn’t help but reach out to brush his helm but stopped shortly before touching. The last thing he wanted was to wake him up. Instead Jazz left a small not ‘eat me’ next to the goodies and hoped the other would do it.  
  
After making sure everything was alright in the apartment, Jazz quickly left and headed for their meeting point. Before that, he pulled aside in an alley and changed into root mode, where he shifted his armor, removing large portions from certain places and in other places changing the armor with brightly colored pieces. A few more decorations, a different visor and Jazz was suddenly a new mech. After which he was on his way again.  
  
It was at actually a nice hotel, much better than some of the places he had been. At least here there would definitely be warm water to wash after. But Jazz knew they wouldn’t allow him in with the way he looked now so he settled for waiting outside and hoped the mech would come soon. It had stopped snowing at one point but it was still fragging cold, especially with this little armor that he wore.

Eventually, a mech stepped outside. He had broad, though plain wings built for flight and carried himself like a noble. “There you are,” he said. “Let’s go.”  
  
Then he turned and flicked his wings at Jazz.

Jazz stuffed the need to sight and easily followed after the other, keeping a respectable distance that still showed he was with him so no one would question his presence.  
  
Primus, was Jazz glad to be inside the hotel. He hadn't realized he was shaking until they were no longer outside and his frame sucked up the heat.

The seeker led them to the lifts and then to his room when they reached the right floor. He sent the keycode early so the door opened as they reached it. He waited until it had closed behind Jazz to turn and speak again. “It is nice to see you again, Ricochet. How have you been?”

"Same old, same old." Jazz responded easily, looking around the room. "How about you? Iacon hasn't bored you yet?" He grinned.

The mech, Starblaze he had called himself before, smiled at him. “Not when there are such interesting sights and attractions.”

"Oh, am I lucky enough to call myself an attraction?" Jazz grinned at him as he went to the window and peeked outside, giving a small wince behind the visor. "You seekers, always pick the highest rooms." He turned and leaned on the window.

“Well, who would want anything less splendid?”  
  
Starblaze has followed him and stood directly behind Jazz now, not quite pinning him against the glass. “It is such a lovely view, isn’t it?”

"You know, you're one of the few who actually compliment me before the fun begins." Jazz found himself commenting but allowed the other close. "That's sweet of you. Are all seekers this charming?"

Jazz tried not to think about his mate at home and instead focused on the task at hand. At least this one was easy and Starblaze was becoming a regular. It...it made it easier, this way.

“Wouldn’t you like to know?” Starblaze teased. “You do have a nice frame for a mech of your standing. You would look absolutely stunning if you were done up like a real mech, nice paint and all.”

Jazz chuckled. "Thanks, darling. Now, before we get carried away you know the rules - I wanna know what you want and for how many joors so that we can get the, ah 'bill' out of the way. Is that alright?"

Jazz always hated this part. The part that made it so glaringly obvious of what he was and what he was doing. But he had learned early on that things like honor didn't have room in this branch of field work.

“Same as usual. A few joor of your time after you take what I give you,” Starblaze told him. His wings gave a faint twitch as his tone changed. “Unless you’d rather make this more permanent? You would want for nothing if you were mine.”

"Alright, cool." Jazz nodded before looking more intrigued. "What do you mean more permanent? As in certain orns during the meta-cycle? Cuz I can arrange that." It would be good to have a secure income, at least. And Starblaze was hardly work, given that he didn't even do anything.

“I mean it like you are completely mine,” Starblaze commented and pressed closer. He refrained from touching yet though. “I have taken an interest in you but I dislike that others get to touch you too. Agree to stay and be mine and you could have anything you ever wanted. I would love to see you looking like a real mech.”

Jazz's visor flared, actually shocked at the offer, he didn't even feel himself press further against the window.   
  
"...You...really? I...." Jazz took a deep breath as he tried to gather his thoughts. "Okay.... Let's clear a couple of things, okay? First, I am a real mech 'Blazer. I have a real name and I don't look like this. This, what you see? This is my job. It certainly doesn't win noble job of the vorn. And I definitely don't like all sorts of creeps doing things to me. But I /need/ the credits. And I need them bad. What you're offering is impossible, not when I have..." Jazz trailed off, uncertain. "It's just no possible..."

“And just what makes it so impossible? Why would you subject yourself to this,” Starblaze’s optics ran up and down his frame at the word, “if you have a better life?”

Jazz hesitated before he looked resigned and shifted, pulling Starblaze to the berth so they could sit there.  
  
"...It's complicated." Jazz paused, looking away before looking back at the other. "...I have a mate. A kind, wonderful sweet mate who has no idea the sort of job I have or how horribly I'm betraying him every time I go out. But-" Jazz started quickly before the other could speak. "...I started this job after his accident. He got hurt and lost his door-wings. He's a Praxian, Starblaze. Can you imagine living with coding so deeply integrated into you and not having the parts for it? It's driving him /mad/. Literally. He's so miserable. He's /sick/ - this is killing him. And we can't afford to get him new door-wings. Do you have any idea how expensive they are? I would need vorns to save up the credits for them. This..." He looked at him and gave him a sad smile. "It will definitely speed up the process. It's horrible. And he will hate me when he finds out. But him hating me means he's sane and alive enough to do it. So I would sell my frame as many times as I have to, to as many mechs as I need to get him those door-wings. Now do you see it's not that simple as you think?"

Starblaze couldn’t help the subconscious twitches his own wings gave as Jazz shared his story. “That is terrible,” he said in a low voice. “Any flyer would offline themselves if they had to go without their wings.”

Jazz shuddered at the words. "...Every time I go out the door I'm terrified by that thought." But he managed to force a smile. "Okay. Now...now that we have that out of the way, let's get to work? Hopefully by the end of the vorn I'll manage to make the needed credits. You're actually helping a lot with that. Your kink is weird." Jazz gave a small laugh. It was either that or cry. Again.

Jazz just wanted to get home again. And hug his mate....if his mate would let him, that is.

"One more question before we begin," Starblaze asked, though it sounded more like a demand.

"Alright, shoot." Jazz said, surprised.

"Just what sort of accident caused this?"

Jazz hesitated. "...He's an Enforcer. Well, he just graduated from being one. There was a chase and he...he crashed." Jazz paused. "Why?"

"Simple curiosity," Starblaze answered. "This is the first you are speaking of yourself and I wanted to know what brought you to our current situation."

Jazz gave a shrug but there was a lingering sadness in his field. "Does it matter? You're the first client to care."

"As I said, I was curious," Starblaze reiterated. "Now, would you like some energon? I had it sent up specifically for your arrival."

Jazz gave him a small smile. Time to do his work. "Thanks." He looked around and indeed on the night stand stood a perfectly harmless cube of energon. Jazz took it and returned next to Starblaze, starting to drink.  
  
"Aw, you even had it extra sweet. That's so nice." Jazz took a couple of gulps, these ones bigger, almost downing it in half. "You know, if I were a big firm or something, I would make you client of the vorn or something." He chuckled.

"I'll accept being given priority over any other client you might entertain."

"That can be easily arranged." Jazz gave a sleepy laugh and hurried to down the rest of the cube before it became too difficult. He found himself leaning on the mech, visor starting to flicker on and off. "You're a good tipper..." He managed to unlock his cover before the other could ask for it.

Starblaze chuckled. "I am glad you enjoy any tip I give to you."  
  
He helped Jazz to the berth as he passed out, though that quickly became he carried Jazz to the berth. Once he had Jazz positioned how he wanted then the most fun part of the night could begin. Although Starblaze did enjoy conversing with him beforehand too. Some nights he would stay to clean Jazz off and continue their discussions but it did not feel the same and he was not in that mood tonight.  
  
When Jazz onlined again to proper functionality, he would find a credit stick with a suitable amount but no Starblaze. The mech had a lot to think about.

* * *

  
Jazz stood under the running water for what felt like joors. Maybe it was joors? He didn’t want to keep track. He just… he couldn’t lay down to recharge next to his mate if he had the feel of someone else still on his plating, their transfluids…

Jazz shuddered, trying to fight the nausea off and resumed his scrubbing of his plating. Finally, when he could come out of the wash racks his plating would gleam and he would smell nice, but Jazz always, always felt dirty and never clean enough.

But the visored mech pushed those thought aside as he headed to the kitchen and came back to the berth room with a warm cube of bitter energon. He crouched next to the side his mate was resting and gently shook his shoulder.

“Love? Wake up.” Jazz murmured, “C’mon Prowler, you haven’t fueled all orn. Wake up, beautiful.” He said, switching to petting his face and trying to coax him awake.

"Leave me alone," came the grumbled response after several long moments. The blanket shifted higher to block his face and the mech hidden beneath it twitched in what was likely an aborted attempt to turn over.

Jazz tried not to let his spark sink too much at that. It was difficult to say the next words but he managed to keep the smile in his voice and made sure his field was loving.   
  
"Hey there sunshine." Jazz tried to gently prod the blanket from the other to reveal him. "Love, please. You have to fuel. I promise to leave you alone if you just drink the cube, okay? It won’t take long. Just a couple of breem... I even made it your favorite, extra bitter." Jazz tried, hoping it worked.

The expression on the Praxian's face might be called a glare if there were more energy in it but in his current state it was closer to a grimace. "Why are you bothering me with this?" Prowl asked of Jazz. "Why can't I offline in peace?"

Jazz's spark froze in its casing and it took all of Jazz's energy not to crumble right then and there.

"...Because you have a mate that loves you and is too selfish to allow you to do that." Jazz said gently and cupped the other's cheek. "...Love, you're already so weak. I'm /begging/ you to hold on just a little longer. I promise I'll fix this, I'll get your door-wings back. I swear, just please..." Jazz brought the energon cube to the other's lips, "...please, you have to refuel. You have to stay alive long enough for me to save you." Jazz murmured, feeling tears pool behind the visor but managed to not let them fall.

"What does it matter?" Prowl asked. "Even if you do manage there's still vorns of work before I can return to work and by then all my hard work won't matter anymore. I'll be lucky if I don't get sent back to the academy to prove myself again. None of it matters anymore..."

"It matters, it matters to /me/." Jazz tried. "Your life matters to me. And you have your life ahead of you. Please, Prowler, this isn't you talking. You have /barely/ fueled these last few orns." He tried to coax the other to refuel, bringing the cube to his lips again. "Love, don't I matter to you? Please, for me... drink for me."

Prowl took a sip so Jazz would move the cube away and he could speak. "Why? Do you want a mate who's gone mad? Do you enjoy caring for a mech losing his mind?"

At this point, Prowl forced himself to sit up, wasting what little energy Jazz had just gotten into him. "By the Pit, Jazz! My /mind/ is going! Do you have any idea what that's like? Imagine losing your music. Forever! There's no way we can fix this. Just stop already. Save yourself the trouble..."

"Primus damn it, I won't!" Jazz yelled at the other finally. "You just have to last a little longer! I'll fix it! I swear to you, I'll /fix/ it!" He didn't even feel himself crying. "But I can't do it if you fight me every step of the way! Do you know how hard it is watching the mech you love - the mech you dreamed of bodning with - literally turn gray before your optics?! I won't stop, I won't /ever/ stop! No matter what! You are going to finish this cube even if I have to force it down your intake!"

Prowl moved forward, arm reaching out. Instead of taking the cube though, he slapped it out of Jazz's hand and all over the floor. "There. The cube is empty. I'm going to recharge now where I can pretend I'm not losing my most important trait."

Jazz felt his frame shake from anger even if his field was full of hurt and so much fear. "Fine!" Jazz cried and suddenly got to his pedes and stormed out of the room. Very soon he was back and before Prowl could react Jazz straddled him, easily pinning his frame. Before, Jazz would've never been able to pin Prowl's larger and stronger frame, but now it was scary how easily he could do that.

Jazz locked Prowl's arms with his pedes and used one hand to squeeze his jaw in such a way to keep it open. With the other hand he brought out another cube from his subspace and started for forcefully give it to Prowl, all the while still unable to stop crying.

Prowl didn't even fight by then. He had lost both too much energy and all his care again. He just let Jazz do as he willed while he just lay there in silence.

Some of the cube spilled outside but Jazz didn't care. Most of it went in Prowl and a part of Jazz felt relieved. He just bought himself a couple of more orn for his mate and when the cube was done Jazz got off from the other to stand beside the berth, shaking.

"...If you do not start drinking on your own, at least a little bit... if you keep fighting me... I will have you committed to a facility, alright?" Jazz cried. "But I do NOT want to do that because it will go on your record and I want you to return to your previous job as much as you do. So I will not allow it to happen if I could help it!"

"I won't get to return anyway so what does it matter..."

Jazz felt his rigid frame slump and he stared at the other, broken. 

"...Just go back to recharge." Jazz whispered and hurried to the bathroom to get cleaning cloths for the mess in the berthroom but once the door to the wash racks closed Jazz crumbled to the ground and buried his face in his hands.  
  
"Primus, please don't take him from me..."   
  
~

It was a few orns later that Jazz found himself in the cafe, now working as a waiter as well as a performer. He needed to have as much as income as possible and the manager was kind enough to allow him the extra joors.  
  
Jazz couldn't help but stare sadly at the mechs there, all drinking their energon and smiling. Oh, what Jazz wouldn't give right now to just see his mate lift a cube and just drink it.

The door gave a soft ding as a new customer entered. This one though, was familiar to Jazz. Familiar and very out of place.  
  
Starblaze.  
  
As luck would have it, Jazz was the only waiter at that point in the orn so he would have to help him.

Jazz hesitated. But there was literally no one else to serve him so the visored mech could only hope the other would't recognize him. Maybe...maybe fate would be at least a little bit kind to him this orn.

"Hello. What can I get ya?" Jazz asked as he went to the mech's table, pad in hand.

He made sure not to stare directly in his face and made his accent heavier.

Starblaze looked him up and down, then back at his menu. He let his wings flick once. "I am only looking for one thing in particular."

"And what would that be? Hopefully we have it." Jazz tried to smile for the client.

Starblaze looked back to him. "Oh I am fairly certain you do, although perhaps not right this moment."

Jazz hesitated, "...I don't understand. What do you mean?" Even if a large part of him was starting to understand.

"I am not looking for some/thing/ so much as someone, and I have heard he works here," Starblaze clarified. "You wouldn't happen to know if a 'Jazz' is here currently, would you?"

"... You know what? He actually does. Now why would a mech of your standing look for a mere waiter?" Jazz asked quietly, dropping all pretenses.

Starblaze smiled and it was halfway to a smirk while still seeming sincere. "Why just to pay a visit to mech at his 'real' job. Oh, and to mention that he knows how to thank me."  
  
He stood then and spoke at normal volume. "Never mind. This is not the location I thought it was. I will be leaving now." Starblaze swept past Jazz and was out the door before he could stop him.

Jazz stared at the mech, uncertain and very much confused at what happened.  
  


* * *

  
  
It was several long joor later when Jazz finally returned home. Primus, he was so exhausted and all he wanted to do was curl up next to his mate.  
  
"Prowler, I'm home." Jazz called. As usual there was no answer. The visored mech went straight to the kitchen and got him a cube, praying Prowl would drink this one without a fight.  
  
"Love, it's time for your--" The words died in his mouth as Jazz opened the door to the berthroom and found it empty. /Fear/ suddenly gripped his spark. "Prowl?" He called. Maybe he was taking a shower?....Which was unlikely because the water wasn't running when the he opened it, it was empty.  
  
Fear suddenly evolved into pure panic. "PROWL!" Jazz suddenly shrieked, thinking the worse. He checked all the windows even if they couldn't be open from the inside, checked and rechecked every inch of the apartment all the while comming his mate like crazy.   
  
Nothing.

Eventually Jazz found the datapad on a table in the living room. He had overlooked it the first few times and probably wouldn't even have paid it mind this time except he had knocked it off the table as he passed. It lit up as he picked it up and he recognized Prowl's normally elegant scrawl.  
  
**[My medic commed, said he had news. He asked me to visit as soon as I could. I assume you want me to go so I will.]**

Even if he was partially relieved Jazz still worried. Prowl was weak and wasn't stable enough to be on his own. He hoped he reached the hospital safe.   
  
Still, Jazz rushed out of the apartment and sped as much as he the traffic allowed him to the clinic where Prowl's been treated so far. He rushed to the registry and asked for his mate, trying not to sound too demanding.

The receptionist slowly typed in the information Jazz gave him and ran a search. He even double-checked it before turning back to him. "I'm sorry but we don't have a patient checked in by that designation. Are you sure this is the medcenter he is being treated at?"

And there was the panic again. Primus, Jazz felt faint.  
  
"W-what do you mean? Designation PROWL. His treating medic is called Bolt! He said his medic called him to come here!" Jazz said, close to frantic.

"It does not seem as though medic Bolt is with any patients right now," the receptionist replied. "Would you like me to request his presence for you?"

"Please!" Jazz said, shaking.

The receptionist did just that and soon there was a rather confused looking medic out in the main lobby. He was directed towards Jazz and approached, still confused. "You are that Praxian's mate, are you not?" Bolt asked.

"Yes, I am. The Praxian is there? With him? He's okay?" Jazz asked, worried.

“He did not tell you anything?” Bolt asked, confused. “Yes, he ought to be fine. He should be in surgery in the morning.”

"Wait, /surgery/?!" Jazz asked, freaking out even more. "Primus, what happened?! Why does he need surgery?! Wait, forget it - tell me where I can find the medic, now, please!"

Bolt frowned. "Surely you did not miss the lack of wings on his back."

"Oh my Primus, I know that!" Jazz cried. "I know he doesn't have wings! I've been saving for his surgery ever since! But right now I need to know what happened and what surgery he needs now! I need to see my mate NOW." Jazz’s field was panicking.

"I'm afraid that won't be possible," Bolt told him. "He has already been transferred to the medcenter that will be handling his surgery."

"Okay, /okay/." Jazz started, shaking as his voice finally broke. "Please, I /need/ you to use more words. What surgery? What... what happened? Just start from the start." He said, not caring that he was crying. "What happened to him? Why does he need surgery? I'm his mate, I deserve to know..."

Bolt sighed. "Your mate was in a serious accident. As a result, he lost both his doorwings. Luckily for him, a mysterious and very generous benefactor provided the funds for his surgery and he is currently in Praxus awaiting the first of what I understand to be several necessary surgeries. Do you understand?"

Jazz....stared. Then he felt faint. Luckily he used the front desk to steady himself as he processed the words. 

"...Prowl's in /Praxus/." Jazz repeated, disbelieving. "...and someone paid for his surgery? He's getting his door-wings?" He whispered.

"Yes, yes, and yes," Bolt confirmed. "Well, assuming there are no complications to the numerous surgeries, that is."

"...How is that possible?" Jazz asked, "Who would donate so much credits? Just... what? I... i want to see him? In which clinic was he sent to? I need to be there with him."

"Even if you drove all night, you would not arrive before he entered surgery." Bolt did seem apologetic about it at least. "I am sorry but he did agree to leaving right away."

"Right. I see. Well, it doesnt matter, i wanna be there for him when he wakes up, plus you said he will need several surgeries... I /need/ to be there for him." Jazz said, desparate.

“I can offer you the name and address but the rest will be up to you,” Bolt said. He also sent him a small data packet containing said info.

"Thank you so much. Sorry for my rudeness." Jazz murmured as he accepted the information.   
  
With those pleasantries out of the way, Jazz left the hospital, dazed.  
  
....Prowl was getting his door-wings. His /mate/ was getting his door-wings. For the first time in so long, Jazz wanted to cry from happiness.

* * *

  
  
After his trip to the hospital, Jazz rushed home for an entirely different reason. He had to pack quickly and head straight for Praxus. He wanted to be there when Prowl woke up.   
  
Jazz was in the middle of looking for his passport when he got a surprising call.  
  
::'Blazer, i can’t talk right now. I'm packing for Praxus cuz you won’t believe it - Prowl's getting his surgery done!:: Jazz squealed.

::Is he now?:: Starblaze responded. ::That is wonderful news. I assume 'Prowl' is your injured mate then?::

::Yes he is! Some anonymous benefactor donated and paid for his surgery. He's right now in Praxus, in stasis and gonna have the first one done in the morning. Primus, I can’t... i can’t believe this is happening. I feel like I’m dreaming and gonna wake up any moment now.::

::You are not dreaming:: Starblaze reassured him. ::You say your mate is in Praxus now though? So how are you going to fill your time until he returns?::

::Actually like I told you, I’m packing right now to drive there. I want to be there when he onlines. Primus, I’ve been dreaming of this moment. I keep crying, but from happiness.:: Jazz laughed.

::You didn’t mention you two were already bonded:: Starblaze said and his tone was surprised.

::Technically... not yet. But we were promised to each other. We're engaged and were even planning a ceremony. But then.... this happened.:: Jazz said sadly, pausing in his packing. ::But that's okay because thanks to some kind mech i get to have my life back! I get to have my Prowler.... oh Starblaze, i can't stop crying from happiness. You didn't see how bad off he was. How he kept begging me to let him fade...:: Jazz trailed off and needed a moment to compose himself.::Anyway, I need to go to Praxus, /now/. I want to be there for him.::

::How do you intend to get in if you aren’t bonded?::

::What does that have to do with anything?:: Jazz asked confused.

::Because his medcenter should be in the middle of the actual city and they only let their own into the full city.::

Jazz stopped, suddenly remembering something Prowl had explained to him. He had visited Praxus only once and even then now that he thought about it Prowl prepared his documents for quite a while to allow him in.

::...Frag. No. That's...that's not fair. He's going to wake up all alone and afraid.:: Jazz said, depressed. ::...I just really need to see him...::

::I thought he was an enforcer?:: Starblaze asked. ::What’s there for him to be afraid of in /Praxus/?::

::It's surgery. Surgeries are scary.:: Jazz explained as if it were obvious but then he sighed. ::...I guess I'll just have to wait for him to call me back...::

::Such an important surgery is sure to take a long time. Are you sure you can survive that alone?::

Jazz sat on the berth, starting to slowly digest the situation. ::...Yeah, I...I think so. Thank you, you're so sweet. I just can't wait for him to call me. ::

::You should come over.::  
  
The suggestion came after several long seconds of silence but Starblaze quickly followed it up with more words. ::Come as yourself. I’ll tell the front desk to send you up.::

Jazz hesitated. ::...Are you sure you want Jazz? Because Ricochet is taking a leave. Forever.::

::What’s the difference except some paint and a disgracefully revealing frame?:: Starblaze paused but decided to add one more thing. ::I knew you’d look good as a real mech.::

::You're a flatterer, darling.:: Jazz said and paused before resuming. ::...I really enjoy our talks. They're just so interesting. However, I want you to be know, that our relationship can be only friendship. What you had between Ricochet and yourself I'm afraid is over.:: He hesitated. ::Will that be too weird for you?::

::We will have to see:: Starblaze answered and his tone seemed surprisingly honest. ::The offer still stands however. Should I come the front desk when we close ours?::

Jazz really could use the company. He just...he needed someone to talk to. And Starblaze was the only one who knew his other job...

::...Alright. I'll drop by right away.::

::Good.:: The tone Starblaze used made it sound like they had settled a topic. ::You do that.::

::'Kay, see you in a few!:: Jazz said and the line went dead. He took a deep sight to compose himself, looking around. 

Soon...soon he'll have his mate and everything will be alright.

* * *

  
Jazz arrived at where the other was staying in around half a joor. He still needed time to compose himself since the news that his mate was getting surgery was slowly starting to sink in. He was still worried beyond words, especially with no call from Prowl, but Jazz could understand that his mate was probably sedated or something. Still, he sent his mate another message, asking him to call as soon as possible.  
  
Primus, he needed someone to share his nerves with and Jazz was so glad in that moment that Starblaze knew his secret.  
  
And just like the seeker said, the front desk knew of his arrival, and Primus, how different did it feel to walk in as a normal mech and not a ...   
  
Jazz chased those thoughts away as he easily made his way to the other's room number and knocked.

Starblaze was waiting for the door alert to buzz when Jazz arrived and he opened it immediately after he heard the knock. The door opened easily and he greeted Jazz much nicer than he always had Ricochet. “Welcome. It’s good to see you.”

"Hey." Jazz smiled at him, unable to hide his excitement and went inside, the door closing behind me. "Thank you. I....could really use the company. I was going slightly mental." He joked.

“Going?” Starblaze asked and his wings twitched. “I’d say you are rather crazy, from what little I have learned of you.”

"Am I?" Jazz couldn't help but give a nervous laugh as he walked in, looking around. He went to glance out the window again, marveling at the high even if it made his grounder coding uncomfortable. "That only must mean you are too if you invited me over. Crazy friends tend to attract one another."

“Perhaps so,” Starblaze mused as he followed Jazz to the window. “I did just partake in quite the unusual venture with a considerable sum. However, that is not our topic of conversation tonight.”  
  
He flicked his wings forward once then continued. “How /are/ you handling this so far? Have you thought ahead to when he returns yet?”

"...I'm actually afraid I will wake up and this will be a dream and he will be in pain and dying again." Jazz whispered, looking back at the other, sad but managed to give him a smile. "I dunno anything about his surgeries and stuff but I sent him a message and explain things as soon as he can." He shook his helm, "Anyway, how long will you stay in Iacon?"

“I will be here a month or so more,” Starblaze replied. “Why do you ask?”

Jazz shrugged, "No reason." He sighed and rubbed his shoulder. "I was just curious. If you stayed long enough maybe... maybe I could introduce you to Prowl."

“That could be interesting,” Starblaze told him. “I would not mind meeting the mech who drove you to such desperation.”

"It wasn't the mech." Jazz explained. "It's... silly, but when you love someone you'll go to great lengths for them. I just..." Jazz shuddered. "...I don't know if he'll ever forgive me." He whispered. "Now I feel slightly like a fool... I cheated on him to get credits I didn't even manage to use..." He gave Starblaze a glance. "I hope you manage to find a mech that will also love you this much and you can love just as back.... You don't have a mate, right? It's not my business but I'll feel bad if you had someone and cheated with me."

“You are not interfering with any relationship of mine. My culture handles these things differently anyway.” Starblaze looked Jazz over again and then switched the subject back. “Perhaps you should buy him something nice with those extra credits?”

"I'll see. He's not that much into gifts, he likes to spend the credits very rationally... I'll just present him with them and see what he'll think will be best." Jazz explained as he headed to the berth. "...May I sit? I hate to admit it but I', exhausted. Too much excitement and work and stress for one orn."

Starblaze gestured with his wings. “Go ahead. I won’t stop you from making yourself more comfortable.”

"Thanks." Jazz said and sighed in relief, smiling at the other. "I just wish I could really meet the mech who made all of this possible. To just...to thank him in person from the bottom of my spark. He saved my mate's life and in turn my own. I owe him everything."

“You don’t have any clue who that mech might be?” Starblaze asked. “Nothing at all?”

Jazz shrugged, "...none of the mechs i know have that much amount of credits to spend on a whim like that." He looked down. "I wish he wasn't anonymous,."

“You cannot think of anyone who might have the desire and the means then?” Starblaze pressed. “What a shame. Though it is not such a bad thing for you, seeing as you claim to owe this mech so much.”

Jazz gave him a /look/. "...Starblaze. Are you... did you... Wait." He stood up, "...Are you implying what I think you're implying?" He whispered, shock and gratitude starting to flare in his field.

“That would depend on what you feel I might be implying.”

Jazz went to the other and took his hands. "...Starblaze? Did that crazy seeker CPU of yours got you to pay for Prowl's surgery?" He whispered, trying not to shake.

“I resent that statement,” Starblaze countered, then flicked his wings. “You are one of the first ground pounders to really care just how important our wings are and your mate seemed like a decent mech.”

But Jazz didn't seem to even hear what the other said as he suddenly squealed so hard and practically jumped the other, wrapping his arms around him and started to repeatedly kiss his cheek.  
  
"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" Jazz said between kisses, not even feeling tears build up behind his visor or how they streamed down. "Oh Starblaze, thank you!"

Starblaze did not seem to mind, or else did not comment if he did. “That’s not all. From my understanding of it, he will be isolated after the last surgeries so he can adjust to properly handling stimuli again. The adjustment is said to be harder the longer a mech went without their wings so it could be weeks. I invite you to remain here in my company until he can return to you.”

Jazz squeezed him one last time before finally letting him go. He brushed his tears and shook his head. "I can't do that... It's too much. Plus, why should you have to pay any more than you did? You can stay at my place - I'll even transfer all of what I saved to you. I just... I don't know how to ever repay you enough. Starblaze, you saved my life..."

“So you have said. However, there is no reason to leave here. I am staying for some time anyway and I have already paid for this place so why not enjoy it with me?”

"...I feel bad. But you've done already so much for me. If...if this is what you really want, then alright." Jazz gave a soft sigh and couldn't help but smile. "You're one of a kind. I seriously cannot wait to introduce you to Prowl. Please, there has to be a way for me to repay you other than simply keeping you company while in Iacon?"

“Well, when you come up with an idea do let me know.” Starblaze flicked his wings once more and the subject changed with it. “Now, it is getting late. Have you had any energon yet? I could have some sent up for us? What is your favorite flavor?”

Jazz shook his helm, smiling. "You're a sweetspark. And since we're on the subject of sweet, that's the flavor I prefer. That would be really nice. I...I think I forgot to fuel this orn." He gave a laugh. "Thank you, Starblaze. I won't stop saying it."

“Of course you will,” Starblaze countered. “Now. Sit and get comfortable. I will comm down to the front desk to have our energon sent up.”

"So bossy." Jazz shook his helm but he sat back down on the berth and rested a hand over his spark, shuttering his visor, for the first time in so long...happy and relieved and able to believe that everything is going to be alright.  
  


* * *

Jazz had the evening shift next orn in the cafe. And no /other/ shifts whatsoever. He felt so happy he could cry. But he had cried enough these last few months so he tried not to.  
  
Primus, everything was going to be okay...  
  
And then things got even /better/ because Jazz got woken up by the comm he had been waiting for so long.  
  
::PROWL!:: Jazz practically yelled over the comms once he picked up, sitting up in the berth in a hurry. He had shared a berth with Starblaze, for some reason that fact not weird to him. The mech had /interfaced/ with him before, sharing a berth for something so simple as recharging was hardly a problem.   
  
::Oh love! Primus! Prowler, is that really you?! Are you okay? Prowl?!::

::No, Jazz. This is the mech who hacked your mate’s comm specifically to comm you after the multitude of messages you left.:: Prowl’s voice was strained and tired but there was life and vibrancy there that had been missing for so long already. Especially once he let himself care again. ::How are you, Jazz?::

::...Oh Prowl.::  
  
Jazz couldn't stop the tears from affecting his voice. ::Oh, /love/. I /ache/ to have you in my arms again. How are /you/? Did they place door-wings on you? Are you in pain? You...you...:: Jazz's words struggled, ::Oh Prowl....::

::The structural support was damaged so they need to repair that before I can proper wings again. They have put a temporary pair on me to sate my coding until I can work up to a proper pair however.:: Prowl sighed then and it carried across the line. ::I will be stuck in the medcenter for the majority of a month, if not longer. The medics want to have my code and processor fully examined as well. There may be hidden damage due to the fact that I was left wingless for so long. My medic actually raged about ‘Iaconian glitches who call themselves medics’ and their refusal to send me here for repairs. It was quite a sight to behold.::

::....It's my fault.:: Jazz whispered, crying silently, ::I should have fought harder. I tried... I tried everything, I swear I did. But Iaconian insurance doesn’t cover door-wings. Oh Prowl, I'm so sorry. If you had stayed longer in Iacon....:: Jazz felt dizzy from that thought. ::...you were fading in my arms.:: Jazz cried finally, voice broken, ::You were dying, you were /begging/ me to die...:: he whimpered.

::The medics were surprised I had not faded worse:: Prowl shared. ::Especially given the circumstances of my accident. Thank you, love. You kept me online long enough to get back to Praxus for these surgeries. I love you so much and I cannot wait to see you again.::

Jazz needed a couple of breems to calm down enough to respond. ::...I want to see you. Please, can...can you fix the documents or have someone or...or.... Prowler, I want to be there with you in Praxus. Can it be possible?::

Prowl considered it for a while before he could finally answer Jazz. ::I think it would be quicker simply to wait it out. There is a waiting period after submitting the forms and I will spend half my time in surgery or exams so I will not have much time to fill anything out. I know it is not what you want to hear but it is the truth.::

::...I know love, I'm sorry. It was worth a shot.:: Jazz whispered. ::...I'm just... need you. My life never felt so empty. I wanted to offline with you. I probably would have.::

::But you were too strong to allow either of us to offline:: Prowl hurried to remind him. ::You were so brave and strong for pulling us through that and soon we can return to our normal life. Won't that be wonderful?::

::...I can't wait, love.:: Jazz whispered. :: Please get well soon. I miss you. Call me as often as you can, it doesn’t matter if it's in the middle of the night. I'll always want to hear your voice, okay?:: He asked, feeling his mate's exhaustion.

::Of course, love. I miss you too and do take care of yourself, alright? I do not want to worry that anything might happen to you without me.::

::I will, love. I want all of your energy to be focused on recovery, okay? Please? The faster you recover the faster I can see you.:: Jazz paused. ::... I love you.::  
  
::I love you too.::  
  


* * *

  
After his call from Prowl, Jazz was in the best spirits he had been since the accident. He was actually looking forward to going to work!  
  
"Hey, 'Blazer, can you open the door?" Jazz called, "I gotta head to work. Want me to bring you something on my way back?"

"Where do you think you are going?" Starblaze called out from the washracks.

"I gotta go to work!" Jazz called. "I'll be back later tonight!"

“Which ‘job’?” Starblaze asked as he stepped into the main area to join Jazz. “I thought you were done now that your mate is having his surgery.”

"I am, with my other, unpleasant job." Jazz explained as he smiled at the other. "Thanks to you I get to /never/ return to that work. But I gotta keep my job at the cafe. I'm waiter and performer there. Even if Prowl got the surgery he'll need time to recover properly and it will be a while before he can return to work. Someone has to bring in credits."

Starblaze frowned. “What happened to the extra credits you had from your other job? You made it sound like a decent amount.”

"I did, but there's no point to waste it." Jazz explained. "Why spend it like this? It could be used for something better than just lazing around." He smiled. "Now, I gotta run or I'll be late."

Starblaze was still frowning. “So you would rather spend your time waiting on others? How quaint.”

"Starblaze, dear, I can't afford to laze around here, you know that." Jazz explain patiently. "I need to keep the job."

Starblaze’s expression stayed the same but he flicked his wings. “How late do you intend to be out?”

"The cafe closes two joors before midnight. I'll need half a joor to return though." Jazz gave him an amused glance. "Why are you so worried? My other job was much more dangerous and I still manage to handle it."

“Because now your mate is gone and I cannot help but to feel responsible for you until he returns. Especially now that I have temporarily taken you in,” Starblaze shared.

"Okay, I definitely want more seeker friends if they are awesome like you." Jazz laughed and even went to hug the other. "I'll be back soon."

“Not soon enough.”  
  
Starblaze led him to the door though and did open it so Jazz could go. “Hurry back though. There’s a chance of rain late tonight and you don’t need to get caught in that.”

"I will." Jazz waved at him. "Bye!"  
  
With that, Jazz hurried out the door, leaving the seeker staring behind him.  
  


* * *

  
Just as promised by Jazz, he was back exactly half a joor after his job was done. He knocked on the door and it was opened for him almost immediately. He grinned at the seeker.  
  
"See? I can be very punctual when I want to." Primus, the world seemed so bright an beautiful now that he knew his mate was going to be alright.

“Right,” Starblaze accepted. “Do come in. Good. Now, follow me.”

"Follow you where? It's not an apartment." Jazz chuckled but did as asked and followed the seeker.

Starblaze led him to the washracks as he spoke. “You are absolutely filthy from that trip and you need to clean up immediately. I will even help you.”

"Why, afraid to get some dirt on ya?" Jazz asked, amused as he shifted, reaching to brush the bottom of his pede with one hand and slapping it on his shoulder. "There, now a seeker has some ground dirt on him!"

Starblaze huffed and then grabbed Jazz by the shoulder and pulled him straight into the washracks. It was a spacious room with a shower in one corner and a sizeable tub in another. There was also a cabinet with several fluffy towels in the last corner. Starblaze brought Jazz over to the shower. “We are cleaning you off, now.”

"Alright, alright. Less mech handling, please." Jazz laughed and shifted away from Starblaze as he turned to start the water. "...Just out of curiosity, how rich are you? This hotel room is huge, no, correction, this /hotel apartment/ is huge. Are you some kind of a noble?"

“But of course,” Starblaze replied, “all Seekers are.”

Jazz stared at him, confused. "...You mean to tell me that ALL seekers are nobles?"

“Well, we /are/ of higher class than your kind. According to grounder culture, that classifies us as nobility.”

"Pfft, no way. Nobles here live in the High Towers, don’t walk among us commoners and definitely /can't/ stuff their ego in the room." Jazz said, smiling at him. "Plus, I’m....well, I /was/ studying Praxian culture. We always planned with Prowl to maybe one orn life in Praxus after he gets enough experience here under his plating. Better be prepared, plus, I was super curious."

“How unusual,” Starblaze remarked. “I was under the assumption that all Praxian enforcers started working within the city after graduation. He must have done either exceptionally well or terribly poor to be out here so young.”

"He was, as you said, /exceptional/." Jazz said, almost dreamily as he started the water and washing. "Prowl's climbing up the latter so fast. How do you think he got injured? Certainly not because of some easy case. I...try to be supportive." Jazz admitted. "...But I worry. He's too selfless."

“He’s certainly not the only one in that relationship.” Starblaze stepped forward to join Jazz under the water. “This will go faster if I work on your back while you do your front.”

"Alright, thank you." Jazz smiled again and turned around, starting to wash his front. "So...tell me something about yourself? I'm the only one sharing. What about you? Siblings? Family?"

“I have no direct siblings but there were several of us in the flock.” Starblaze started gently washing Jazz’s back as he spoke. “My creator trine were one of the sets most often caring for the younglings but they were not the ones to teach us to fly.”

"I see. And for a Poly, I admit trines are fascinating. Or seeker culture as a whole. It's so different." Jazz said, giving a soft sight "Flying...That's so /cool/ that you can fly! My coding is making my plating craw at the thought of being off the ground but at the same time I soooo wanna try it too."

Starblaze chuckled. “Perhaps you have a Vosian ancestor then. The desire for flight can linger even in grounder forms if they code is there. That is believed to be where the citizens of our sister city got their desire for speed.”

"Seems logical. But for now I’ll keep my pedes on the ground." Jazz chuckled. "I think you and Prowl will get along real nice." He glanced back at him, "My turn to wash you?"

“You would want to?” Starblaze asked. His wings even flared slightly in shock.

"Why wouldn't I?" Jazz asked, surprised. "You washed me. It's only fair. Plus, you have wings. Trust me, I know firsthand from Prowl how hard it is for them to wash."

Starblaze thought it over for a moment but did relent. “I suppose you are right. They are not the easiest appendage to properly clean and I did not think to bring an attendant.”

Jazz shook is helm, smiling. "You're such a bratling." He motioned with his hand, "Okay, turn."

Starblaze did so without a word. He flared his wings a bit before speaking too. “Let’s see how good you are with wings then.”

"Big wings." Jazz said, amused, as he looked them over and started in the familiar pattern he did on Prowl's door-wings...  
  
"...You gave Prowl his doorwings back. I will worship yours in gratitude." Jazz murmured, longing in his field for his mate as he worked.

“You do realize my wings are a bit grander than mere doorwings,” Starblaze commented but his tone and field held joking in it. “Even as nice as his new ones might be.”

Jazz smiled, field happy as he worked. "I know i sound like a broken record but... I can’t wait to see him. I miss him so much." He murmured.

“Then we can pass the time until his return together,” Starblaze suggested. “How long will it be until he returns?”

"Month or so." Jazz said, sadness flickering in his field. "He told me he will undergo multiple surgeries. He currently has temporary door-wings to sate his code need. I... haven’t heard him this sane since..." Jazz shuddered. "... Right. Anyway. I dunno if I can stay here with you the entire month, but I’ll try." Jazz murmured.

“Because you have to work?” Starblaze asked as he let the water rinse his frame.

"Work. Also make sure the apartment is clean and stuff. Maybe see some of my other friends. I... kinda ignored them during the last few months. I simply didn’t have the time. I dunno. Plus, I’ll need some time alone also to process things and stuff..." Jazz explained as he watched the seeker.

“I see,” Starblaze said. “I suppose it would be rude of me to want to spend time with you during my limited vacation when there are others you could see at any point who might want to see you instead.”

“I see,” Starblaze said. “I suppose it would be rude of me to want to spend time with you during my limited vacation when there are others you could see at any point who might want to see you instead.”

"You are impossible." Jazz actually gave a soft laugh. "Alright, I'll see about making sure i spend my time with you. Plus, it could mean you just have to visit often Iacon." He grinned at him. "Now, shall we head to bed? I'm beat."

Starblaze flicked his wings. “I can agree with that. It has been a long orn and moving to the berth sounds like a wonderful idea.”

After drying themselves up both mechs found themselves in the huge berth, Jazz quickly falling in recharging under the soft covers.

Starblaze quickly scooted across the berth to lay beside Jazz despite the room the berth afforded them both. He didn’t speak but did begin gently stroking some of Jazz’s plating near his hip.

Halfway into recharge Jazz gave a soft purr. "S'nice..." he murmured, barely audible. "Prowler..."

Starblaze’s slight frown went unnoticed in the dark and he continued to explore the other’s frame lightly. He said nothing and his touch was rather light but it was still much more than he should have been doing at all.

Jazz couldn't help but press into said touch, shifting closer to the warm frame next to him and twining their legs. "Love..." Jazz mumbled.

Starblaze moved his hand down to Jazz’s panel and began stroking the seams around his cover. His touch now was more substantial but still gentle. He also made sure their legs were well tangled so Jazz stayed close.

Jazz hummed in pleasure, practically offline yet his frame kept responding to the touched. It took some time, not that Jazz noticed, but his cover did retract at some point.

Starblaze toyed with the area around Jazz’s valve for a while longer before he pressed into him. He knew Jazz could easily handle two fingers but started with just one to further tease the Polyhexian’s frame.

Jazz's breath hitched and he balled up his hands. He tried to curl around the finger, pleasure flaring more openly in his field.  
  
"Prowl..." Jazz breathed.

Starblaze poked and pressed and even added a second finger to tease and excite Jazz. However, just as Jazz’s charge was starting to reach a peak, Starblaze stopped and removed himself from within Jazz. He took a moment to clean himself as the disappointment came over Jazz in place of pleasure and Starblaze smiled to himself in the dark.

The smaller mech just curled up more on himself, want clear in his field.

Soon, Starblaze was slipping into recharge too right beside Jazz.  
  


* * *

  
Next orn when Jazz woke up he was surprised to discover an annoying charge. Had he dreamed of something? Probably Prowl. It was embarrassing and he hoped Starblaze didn't notice anything when he hurried over to the wash racks to take care of it. Primus, he missed Prowl.

Eventually, Starblaze knocked on the door. “Are you almost done in there?” he called out through it. “I had energon sent up for us and it just arrived. As sweet as the morning cook could make it for you.”

"Yep, will be out in a bit!" Jazz called, charge taken care of thankfully. Around five breems later Jazz got out, dry and smiling. "Mech, I know you are offering but I feel bad. Room service is expensive. Can I at least pay some of the energon you order for me?"

“Room service is an expected aspect of staying in a place like this. There is no additional charge,” Starblaze explained. “Just enjoy yourself and let me care for you god a while.”

"Thank mech." Jazz smiled and took the offer cube. "So, any plans for this orn?"

“None in particular. I intend to remain in for the orn,” Starblaze said and his wings moved too. “I have had my fill of the sights out there for a few orn.”

"Have you? Iacon's big! You really saw everything?" Jazz asked while sipping the energon. "I can show you around tonight. I have a shift in two joors and after it I can be all yours again."

“How many shifts do you have during this time?” Starblaze questioned.

"I have shifts every six orns. Thankfully, now they don’t need to be double or triple." Jazz said with a smile. "Only difference is during which time of the orn."

“I see…” Starblaze said and frowned. His wings moved too in disapproval. “I would appreciate a copy of your schedule so I know where you are if I online at some point when you might be gone.”

"Sure." Jazz pinged him with his schedule, finishing up the cube of energon in a few more gulps. "What's your job back in Vos? You can't /all/ be nobles." He chuckled.

“There are shuttles who do work ferrying loads around the planet but that’s not a task for Seekers. We are the military aspect for both our city and our sister city.”

Jazz gave him a surprised look, canting his helm. "Wait, you're telling me you're military?"

“As far as your kind consider it, yes,” Starblaze said. “It is simply a way of life for us. The Air Commander is often the Wing Lord, or else they are typically bonded.”

"Huh, I see." Jazz said, opening his vents further as he felt his frame grow warm at places he didn't want it to get warm. Dammit. What was up with him? "I've always wanted to see Vos. Maybe after Prowl gets better and things return to normal we can visit Vos and you?" He asked excitedly.

“That could be interesting,” Starblaze agreed and he flicked his wings. “Vos doesn’t accept tourists very easily but there is much less datawork than to get into Praxus.”

Jazz grinned at him and felt the heat grow uncomfortably. "Well, anyway. I think I'll soak a little in the bath. Maybe before work we can play a game?"

“What sort of game are you proposing?”

"I have cards on me. Don't ask why." Jazz chuckled as he already headed for the wash racks. "I'll be out in a few, kay?"

Starblaze looked confused. “I thought you were done washing up?”

"I want a small soak in the tub. S'not every orn I get to soak in something so big. It's ...a luxury I don't often have." Jazz said with a smile.

That seemed to console the Seeker and he gave a small smile. “Would you like some company? There is more than enough room for two of us to comfortably fit.”

"Ah." Jazz felt embarrassed. "Sure, but let's save it for tonight after our walk? I just... I want a few moment alone." He winced. "Sorry, hope it's okay..."

He had a charge that would not go away if the seeker joined him in the tub.

“Only if you are absolutely sure,” Starblaze said and there was a heavy dose of questioning in his voice.

"Sure I'm sure." Jazz said as he walked, "Now, I'll be quick, see you in a bit!"  
With that Jazz hurried and closed the door, sighing as he allowed his vents to fully open and expel the heat. Primus...what was wrong with him?

* * *

  
Much to Jazz's horror, he did not stop feeling hot. It got so worse to the point where he had to visit the washracks more than three times per orn and he worried if Starblaze would think him some kind of creep. Jazz tried to reason it out - it can't be his 'lack' of partners. He hated himself for what he did and the mechs he had sold his frame too. There was no logical explanation why he felt this way. Could he be attracted to Starblaze...? That /was/ a possibility, and Jazz admitted to himself that he usually would have been. But now? When all he did was think and worry about Prowl, he never even caught himself thinking about Starblaze in /that/ way.   
  
It just made no sense.   
  
But one thing was sure. Jazz needed to remove himself from this environment. Maybe after he spent a few orns in their home and just on his own, things would quiet down? He certainly hoped so.  
  
"Hey, Blazer, I've been meaning to talk with ya." Jazz explained after they had their breakfast in the hotel room. "I'm thinking about going....well, going home this orn, before my work shift." He winced. "It's not that I don’t enjoy the perks of this first class hotel room, because trust me, I do. It's just... I need some time on my own. To gather my thoughts and stuff. Please don't be upset. I'll visit as often as I can." Jazz promised.

Starblaze frowned but his tone was level. “I disapprove of that idea. I like having you here.”

"Aw, that's sweet." Jazz smiled at him. "But you're probably tired of me. And I do think it's time I leave. You've already done so much for me."

“On the contrary,” Starblaze protested, “I quite like the company. It helps keep the orns here from growing too dull.”

"I understand sweetie but I /really/ have to go." Jazz said, apologetic. His charge was on its way to drive him mad. "I swear I'll visit as often as I can."

“What do you have there that you are lacking here? Surely your mate hasn’t already returned home?”

"No, but I just..." Jazz sighed. "Please, please don't fight me on this. I just want a couple of orns on my own. It was so kind of you that you spent the time with me after Prowl left to get treatment, but I need to process things on my own."

“I can leave you be here?” Starblaze offered. “There should be more than enough room for you to feel as though you were alone.”

"Starblaze... You don't have to do that." Jazz said sadly. "...I just want to go home."

The Vosian almost sounded petulant as he replied. “I do not like that idea.”

Jazz gave an amused laugh. "You're being silly." He stood up and stretched before going over to hug the seeker. "I'll visit you tomorrow before work, okay?"

Starblaze said nothing and didn’t respond to Jazz’s hug either. He just sat and watched Jazz.

"Aw, c'mon, don't be like that." Jazz said as he slightly pulled away but didn't let go of the other yet. "Starblaze, please. You're blowing this out of proportions. I promised I would visit, didn't I?"

“I suppose you did.”

Jazz gave him a gentle smile and leaned down to kiss his cheek before pulling away. "Kay. So I'll be going now. I'll even give you a call tonight and I'll see you in the morning." With that Jazz headed for the door.

Jazz gave the mech a small, encouraging wave and opened the door.  
  
...or he would have, if the door wasn't locked. Jazz blinked and turned to look at the other. "Blazer, can you unlock the door?"

“Yes.”  
  
Starblaze made no move to do so, however.

Jazz stared at him, confused. "...Can you do it now?"

“I most certainly could,” Starblaze replied, “but I have no intention of doing so.”

Now Jazz's confusion was more than obvious. "What do you mean? I have to go. Just open the door."

“No,” Starblaze stated as he finally stood. He crossed the room in a formal glide that had a menacing air and stopped right by Jazz. “We have yet to discuss how you intend to repay me.”

Jazz...stared. "Wait, what?" The confusion got mingled with worry now. "...repay? You never said anything about repaying you...."

“So I did,” Starblaze countered. “Back at your little cafe.”

Too many thoughts passed Jazz's processor in that moment. A feeling of hurt also flared in his field. It;s not that he wanted the pro bono gift from Starblaze. He wouldn't have minded at all. It's just...  
  
"... A little warning would've been nice." Jazz said sadly. "And I'll repay ever credit you gave. I'll even transfer what I have now and the rest I'll hopefully have by the rest of the vorn." He explained quietly before shaking his head. "...I just don’t get why you were silent about this for so long. I asked so many times. You never even once mentioned you wanted to be repainted in any way."

“Because I had said it before you found out what I did,” Starblaze explained. “I did not anticipate that you would forget, although I also had not anticipated that you would be unable to connect the dots about my involvement without assistance.”

Jazz didn't know what to say. He wanted to avoid this awkward situation from the start. "...Right. I'll pay you back the credits. I promise. Just....you should have said earlier." He sighed, "Can I go now?"

“I am not interested in your credits.”  
  
Starblaze practically looked over Jazz by now and his tone remained level but expectant as he spoke. “You have much more you can offer than mere credits.”

"...What do you mean?" Jazz asked quietly, trying not to allow more darker thoughts to enter his mind.

“You have spent the last few nights trying to proposition me while you were recharging. Clearly, you have interest in me. Why don’t we explore that while we can?”

"Wait, what?" Jazz asked, shocked. "What in the world are you talking about? I never propositioned to you!"

“Near enough,” Starblaze replied. “You pressed against me with a heated frame and your hands wandered to try and rile me up. I was unsure exactly what you wanted until the previous night where you went for my panel as well.”

Jazz looked horrified. "No! I-I did no such thing! I would never!" He cried out, pressing a hand to his mouth, "What are you talking about?! Why are you telling me this now?"

“Because I did not intend to let your recharging actions ruin what was occurring while we were online. However, now that you are running, I must share.”

Jazz looked stricken. "...I …that's not possible." He tried to open the door. "I-I need to leave, now. /Please/ Starblaze!"

“You are not going anywhere,” Starblaze told him. “This suite is your home for the next few weeks.”

"...Okay, Starblaze, you're starting to really scare me." Jazz said, uncertain as he shifted away from the other. "I /swear/ I'll pay you back every credit. I will. But right now I-I want to leave."

“Oh you will repay me,” Starblaze said, “but under my terms now. And firstly, you are staying here. Unless you’d rather that mate of yours find out everything you did?”

"...Ate you /threatening/ me?!" The hurt morphed into anger and Jazz frowned, glaring at the other. "I told you, I won’t hide what I did from him so go ahead and tell him! I will pay you back. Now open this door! Open it now!" Jazz said, raising his voice.

“No.”  
  
Starblaze was unperturbed by Jazz’s outburst. “Your mate seems like an honorable mech. He would pay the debt, I’m sure. Although from him I might prefer favors. How helpful it would be to have an enforcer in my debt. Isn’t that how the politicians get away with illegal acts?”

Jazz felt himself panic. "You can't do that! Prowl won't play your game! What is your problem?! I thought we were friends! Open the door!" Jazz turned to bang on it, "Someone, open the door! Now! Help!" He cried out loud.

“I can and I will,” Starblaze told him calmly. “And so will your mate. I gave him back his wings. You don’t know how desperate a mech gets without them. He’s do anything I wanted to avoid losing them again.”

Jazz froze and looked at the other, the hurt turned anger now slowly morphing into terror. "...What the slag do you mean? You... you can't take his door-wings! No medic would ever agree to remove them!"

“Every mech has their price. I know a few me ha who would do it for enough credits.”

"No, you won't." Jazz shook his helm, feeling desperate. "That's not possible. He's in Praxus, safe!" Jazz felt his frame shake. "How could you do this?! You were pretending this whole time!" He yelled, upset.

“Safe for now perhaps,” Starblaze commented, “but did you not say he was returning? Or I could go to Praxus and introduce myself and invite him out. I would have a far easier time entering than you ever could.”

Jazz suddenly reacted, shoving the other. "You wouldn't! You won’t touch him!" He cried out. "Primus, how did I fail to see the monster you are! Primus, _Primus_ you scum bag!" He was shaking, unable to calm down.

“You are lucky I am still being nice.” Starblaze frowned and lifted his wings to an angered tilt. “I could demand you return with me to Vos or stay here past your lover’s return. Instead, I am merely requesting the remainder of my time in Iacon. You will be home before your lover even knows that you were ever gone.  
  
“Besides…” And now Starblaze leaned in close, almost to the point of touching. “Your frame craves my touch. I could make you fall to your knees and beg for me to frag you.”  
  
To prove his point, Starblaze reached out and caressed one of Jazz’s sensor horns.

Jazz cried out at the touch and treacherous feelings spreading over his frame. He pulled away, putting good distance between them, trembling.  
  
"You're horrible. How can you think I'll trust you even the slightest now?!" Jazz asked, upset. "You can easily demand for more until he returns!"

“Oh? And just what else do you have to offer? Your meager credits mean nothing to me.”

"How do I know you won't threaten me again with him for more? How can I know this isn't a onetime thing?" Jazz asked, trying desperately to thing the Enforcers for help and stalling.

“You have my word that I will release you when I leave Iacon so long as you willingly pay your debt,” Starblaze promised.

"I want a contract." Jazz demanded. Prowl's influence on him was showing. "I want a contract that will make sure of that."  
  
Primus, why weren't the enforcers answering?! He tried to ping someone, /anyone/ but nothing! Jazz's fear only kept growing.

“Huh.” Starblaze’s wings moved not dissimilar to Prowl’s in surprise. “If that is your desire, then fine. Draw one up for us.”

Jazz stared at the other brokenly. This...this is exactly what he did to save credits for Prowl. It would seem he has to do it a little while longer.   
  
"...Why me?" Jazz asked quietly, giving up pinging numbers. "Of all the pleasure mechs Iacon can offer you, surely you'll find a lot with higher quality than me."

“Higher quality perhaps, but none so interesting. Most pleasurebots are just that. You were something different and much more interesting.”

Jazz didn't know how to respond to that. "...Why are the comms not working?" He whispered.

“There is shielding on the higher floors of high end locations such as this to allow for maximum privacy,” Starblaze explained. “I recently decided to enact it.”

"....How convenient." Jazz said and went to sit on the berth, looking down. "...You're literally blackmailing me to interface with you."

“That’s one way of considering it,” Starblaze countered. “Alternatively, I gave you an advance payment of a hefty sum for services yet to be performed.”

Jazz shuttered his visor and buried his face in his hands, thinking. He stayed like that for a long time before finally looking up and glancing at the other.  
  
"...I'll draw a contract. You'll look it over. We'll sign it. Then when your stay is over you'll leave and you'll leave Prowl and me alone. Forever."   
  
This wouldn't be any different than what he did before. After all...he had no dignity to defend. At least he could do is protect Prowl's reputation.

“That’s good then. Have it done before tonight so we can have this settled before it is time to recharge.”

"...I have a shift at the cafe later this orn." Jazz whispered.

“Not anymore, you don’t,” Starblaze replied. “You will be busy working off your debt for the time being.”

"You plan to frag me /all/ the time?" Jazz couldn't help but snap.

“Perhaps.” Starblaze’s reply could have been sincere or it could have been mocking. His tone was perfectly balanced to be either. “You do have a considerable amount of credits to account for.”

Jazz gave a small huff that was more desperate at the helplessness of the situation and looked down at his pedes. "...Will you still want the credits I have saved up?" He asked quietly.

“What do you hope to accomplish by offering me those?”

"I wasn't offering anymore. I just wanted to know if you'll want that as well." Jazz couldn't look up, feeling too ashamed of himself.

“I have no need for your credits. Many of them were not from me, as I understand it, so there would be no ‘returning’ them.”

Jazz didn't move for a long moment before finally looking at the other, a look of utter defeat on his face.  
  
"...Do you have a blank data pad?"

“I can find one,” Starblaze said and he got up to look.  
  
He was back a few kliks later and offered a datapad to Jazz.

* * *

  
  
Jazz was quick you write the contract, making sure the time period and their agreement was clear. In it, Jazz wrote what (he assumed) was expected of him and what of Starblaze and that by doing so, his debt to the seeker was repaid. It was mentioned he was not allowed to leave the hotel room. He was to agree to any form of interfacing except spark-play. He refused to involve other mechs. And most important he wanted things to be as discreet as possible.

At the end of the time frame both would leave their separate ways and never see or talk to each other again.

"Here." Jazz handed him the pad. "....we could have been friends you know. Was a month if fragging worth it?" He muttered.

“I told you that I didn’t like the idea of other bots touching you. We could have done this more friendly if you hadn’t pushed my hand,” Starblaze replied.

"I do not like other bots touching me either." Jazz said. "I hate what I did. I hate myself for it as well. That's why I was so happy when you paid the hospital. Finally I could have stopped. But before that, i at least was prepared for it. I was prepared mentally and physically for some strange creepy mechs doing things to me. If you had offered this from the start, if you had told me you would have paid for the surgery in demand of interfacing I would have accepted it. Gladly, openly, willingly. But you had to blackmail me instead. You tool my choice away from me even if I was gonna agree either way."

“I gave you plenty of opportunity,” Starblaze retaliated. “You never even bothered to ask how I found you as Jazz.”

"Whatever. Just sign the contract and you'll have what you want." Jazz said quietly.

“What has you in such a sour mood?” Starblaze questioned as he claimed the datapad. “You needn’t even be online for any of it. I could just as easily have drugged you without your knowledge.”

"I guess...." Jazz said quietly. "Still, my frame is being used. Do you interface with awake partners?" He couldn't help but ask, curious.

“Not often, but occasionally,” Starblaze replied. “Why do you ask? Do you want to remember what I feel like?”

"No... I was just curious." Jazz said quietly, "out of all my clients I handled your kink the best. There were a few clients that liked to hurt me but at least they tipped a lot for that." He couldn’t help but smile bitterly. "Primus, I sound like a whore."

“Well you did do the work of one.” Starblaze spoke the words calmly. There was no putting Jazz down or needlessly insulting him when it was just a statement of fact. “How did you ever hide the injuries from your mate?”

"I didn't even had the need to hide. He was so bad off, he didn't notice them at all." Jazz said without even thinking reaching to touch his throat.

Starblaze watched him for a moment before looking down to read through the contract. He signed it quickly enough and offered it back to Jazz. “You must be glad none of them were as interested in you as I.”

"Maybe. Though I can't say I can call my last vorn "lucky"." Jazz explained as he looked over the contract, signed it as well and made a copy of it in a data chip before offering the copy to the other and subspacing the pad. "I guess all I can say now is...enjoy me while you can, huh?" He asked quietly. He could do this. One last job and everything would be alright.

Starblaze accepted the chip and stashed it in his subspace before speaking. “Yours is at least going better than your lover’s.”

"Perhaps." Jazz said quietly as he went to sit on the berth. "I still think you'll grow tired of me by the end of your stay."

“Perhaps you should have included that as a clause then; that you can leave should I grow bored. I find that unlikely though as you are quite fascinating.”

"You keep saying that. I'm just Poly in Iacon. There is absolutely /nothing/ interesting about me. You're a seeker, military at that. I'm the last mech you should even have any arousing thoughts about. I lack /wings/ of any kind."

“Yet you have an innate understanding of just how vital they are,” Starblaze countered. “Few grounders have that.”

Jazz just shrugged as he laid back, stretching on the berth. "Since when did you develop this kink?"

“Which kink are you asking about?”

"The one where you need your partner in recharge in order to frag them?"

Starblaze flicked his wings. “It is simply easier when I do not need to worry about the other mech touching me in return. I enjoy touching others but not their reciprocation. I have yet to meet a mech who can resist touching when they get riled up.”

"Why don't you like being touched?" Jazz asked, more curious than he cared to admit.

Starblaze’s wings moved again. “I don’t know, I simply never have liked touch.”

Jazz wanted to poke the matter more but decided against it.  
  
"Right." Jazz said quietly, sighing before shuttering his visor and trying to ping again his mate. But the line was still blocked. Lovely.

“You’ve gone quiet,” Starblaze stated after a few kliks.

"I dunno what to say." Jazz admitted.

Starblaze thought for a moment before standing and reaching a hand out to Jazz. “Why don’t we go enjoy that tub you like so much? Surely that is acceptable.”

Jazz stared at the other for a moment. He held no illusions that the other will ask for interfacing. The contract was signed, so did it really matter anymore?  
  
"...Sure." Jazz said softly and stood up from the berth, going over to the seeker. "I even have a funny story about a tub."

“Do you now?” Starblaze asked as he started to lead Jazz to the washracks. “You should share.”

"I think it's funny. Prowl not so much." Jazz started as he allowed to be led. "We were interfacing one time in the tub, and the overload knocked us both out." He started, amusement flickering in his field at the memory. "Somehow I ended up sinking under the water. Prowl almost blew a gasket when he onlined and found me passed out under the water." He snickered.

Starblaze laughed too and even his wings moved with the action. “That seems like a rather exciting method of interfacing for you. You don’t strike me as an incredibly bold mech in regards to berthroom preferences.”

"I don't?!" Jazz asked, incredulous. "I happen to be very open to all sort of kinks! If I wasn't, I wouldn't have been able to handle what I did for the last several months. I'm not vanilla."

Starblaze chuckled further. “You needn’t be so defensive. Desperation can drive a mech to some crazy extremes. You did say you enjoyed our time together best of all your clients so it’s a reasonable conclusion.”

"...Do you think he will forgive me?" Jazz tried and failed to stop voicing out the question that's been eating inside him since the first client he ever took. "...Do I even deserve forgiveness?" He whispered.

“I don’t honestly know,” Starblaze replied. “I can lie to you and say whatever you want however.”

"...Alright. If I was your mate and did that, will /you/ forgive me?"

“I am fairly certain the only thing your mate and I share is an interest in you.”

Jazz didn't know how to respond to that so he simply waited for the tub to get filled with warm water before getting in with Starblaze.

Much to his later shock, Starblaze did not demand for anything in return - they didn't interface and Jazz actually enjoyed the bath until it became late and both went to recharge.  
  


* * *

  
Jazz was staring out the window of the hotel room, looking at the clouds that passed right next to them or the ground that was so far, far away. He shuddered.  
  
"How old are seekers when they are taught how to fly?" Jazz asked, curious.

“We get our flight capable wings as our secondary youngling upgrade. Before that we can only hover a few feet. Transformation is not enabled until the final youngling upgrades however. New flyers will almost always test their limits. This way, at least they are old enough to understand the potential consequences.”

"Huh, neat system. Youngling of grounders are allowed to transform with their secondary upgrade as well, but are allowed to drive only at tracks and under supervision. I guess it's universal that the little ones try to test their limit." Jazz said with a smile.   
  
Jazz paused, thinking. "...Starblaze, am I heavy?"

Starblaze stopped to stare at him. “Why would you ask something like that?”

"I, um..." Jazz hesitated. "I was wondering, if, you know, you could lift me....you could...maybe ...fly...a bit?" He winced.

Embarrassment flared in his field.

Starblaze stated at him for that and then seemed to give it genuine consideration. “Grounders rarely match our weight unless they are convoy class and you are tiny at that. I could almost assuredly carry you for a while, although I am not a transport mech so you would not fit inside me in my alt mode.”

"No, not fit. Just... I really wanna see what it feels like to not have my pedes on the ground." Jazz explained, “I’ve traveled with a shuttle before, but this is different. Shuttles somehow don’t tease our coding as much."

“I did not mean that as a dismissal of the idea,” Starblaze replied. “Just that it would require me to carry you in this mode and would limit how far and fast we could go.”

"That's okay, not sure how fast i want you to go too." Jazz actually sounded amused. "So that's a yes? When can we try it?" He asked, excited.

“When do you want to try it?” Starblaze asked.

"Now?" Jazz asked, unable to have patience.

Starblaze chuckled and his wings flared slightly. “You really must have a flyer somewhere in your ancestry. That’s the only thing that makes sense.”

"Probably." Jazz grinned at him. "So is now okay?"

“I don’t see why not.”

"Yes!"  
  
That's how they found themselves outside, clear from building or the air traffic. Due to Iacon's frame diversity they had to have special traffic for the flight frame.  
  
Of course being outside meant Jazz was forbidden from using his comms or else Starblaze will go forward with his threat. That almost put off Jazz enough to not go.  
  
Almost.  
  
His curiosity was bigger and he agreed to the terms, naturally. That's how they found themselves in the clearing.   
  
"You're sure my weight wont cause you to fall?" Jazz asked uncertainly.

“You barely weigh anything,” Starblaze replied. “I’ve probably carried heavier loads in my subspace.”

"Okay, you're /exaggerating/." Jazz shook his helm. "I'm a mini, but that doesn't mean I'm light."

“You are to me,” Starblaze commented. To prove his point, he stepped over and picked Jazz up into his arms with ease. “See? You barely even weigh anything.”

Jazz couldn't help but wrap his arms loosely around the other, looking down. "Because you're still on the ground. Gravity will make me much heavier."

“Let’s test that theory then, shall we?”  
  
With no further warning, Starblaze powered on his thrusters to low and they began to rise into the air.

Jazz gave a startled yelp as they started going up, the ground becoming further and further away from them.  
  
"We're flying!" Jazz cried, wrapping his hands more tightly around the other.

“Technically, yes,” Starblaze agreed. “Although this is not what making flying so amazing. Unfortunately, that is not something I can show you given our limitations.”

"That's okay. Not sure I would handle-we're really far from the ground!" Jazz called as he dared to look down. "Primus!" He squeezed the other tighter.

Starblaze held tight to him and chuckled. “Still primarily a grounder though. That’s a shame. I bet your lover would have enjoyed seeing wings on you.”

"If one orn we can afford them, I'll probably get some." Jazz buried his face, frame starting to shake.

That seemed to surprise the seeker and it was clear in his field for a moment before he masked it again. “Is that so? Was it your idea or his?”

"I think both. He made the absolute same comment as you. About how I would look with door-wings. I told him I won’t mind having a pair if we could afford them..." Jazz trailed off as he glanced down and felt /dizzy/.

“Are you alright?” Starblaze questioned. “Did I go too high for you?”

"I-I..." Jazz shuddered, shuttering his visor. "Primus, I wanna say no... I feel like you'll drop me any moment."

“Should we land then? Or would you prefer if I just go lower?” As he asked, Starblaze was already letting them sink close to the ground.

"...I need a moment. Stop, don't go lower. Just....hover here? Please? Let me get used to it." Jazz admitted.

Starblaze stopped as Jazz has asked but said nothing as he let him adjust.

Jazz took a few moment to gather himself and just looked around. Neither said anything and just enjoyed the comfortable silence.  
  
"...Okay, you can go up again." Jazz said quietly. "...I want to see the city up high."

“All the way or should I let you adjust again?” Starblaze wanted to know.

"Pause a few times for me to adjust." Jazz answered, unable to loosen his hold on the other. "It will be a view worth the fear."

Starblaze did as Jazz requested; rising slowly and stopping when he needed it. It took them a joor but eventually they were as high as Jazz wanted.

Jazz felt his entire frame /shake/ but he managed to look around. "...It's beautiful. It's stunning." Jazz whispered, for a moment forgetting where he was. "Oh, you seekers are so lucky, living with such views... Primus."

“Some of your kind clearly like them enough to live at heights as well,” Starblaze commented. “Do you not trust living in such a high apartment to see such sights yourself?”

"Oh, I wouldn't mind. But it's mostly nobles or insanely rich mechs who can actually afford such high places, and I mean the high ones. Prowl and I live on the 11th floor. It's very high but nowhere in comparison to, let's say, your hotel room, which is 81st floor." Jazz chuckled softly as he kept looking around. "...It's like a dream."

“You would love Vos,” Starblaze muttered suddenly.

"...I would love to visit it, yeah." Jazz said quietly. Then he seemed to think about it. "Wait, do you even have /roads/ there? How can a grounder move around?"

“There is low-lying area,” Starblaze informed him. “There are also bridges higher up, maybe halfway to the tops of towers. I do not know how most grounders handle such but surely you would do fine with your bits of seeker coding.”

"Sounds like a unique place." Jazz said as he stared at the setting sun. "No wonder seekers rarely live outside Vos. Now I'm surprised how there are so many here in Iacon." He explained. "Oh, you're not getting tired, right?"

“I am fine, trust me.” Starblaze didn’t even pause as he shifted the topic back. “It is the change of scenery, I am sure. Although there is a certain degree of politics to everything in Vos that it is nice to escape for a while as well.”

"Politics? What do you mean?" Jazz said as he shook his helm. "And you can start slowly lowering down."

"Has your mate ever explained to you the ranking system Praxus uses and how every time you vent it can raise or lower your status? It is not entirely dissimilar to that, although ours in not nearly so rigid."

Jazz blinked. "...I did follow a bunch of rules when I visited Praxus with him but I didn't notice anything in particular. Wadda ya mean?"

"Well you probably wouldn't seeing as you were not bonded to him at the time," Starblaze replied. They had already sank a considerable distance since Jazz had asked him to return to the ground. "He likely did not want you to worry about how much you might have hurt his reputation. It is bound to happen though; few non-natives can navigate Praxus without losing rank. Even my kind have trouble following some of their subtleties but our cities have always been close so we need not worry how strictly we are adhering to their restrictions."

"...What do you mean? I cost him rank?" Jazz asked, surprised. "That can’t be true! Prowl never mentioned anything!"

"As I said, he likely did not want you to worry," Starblaze repeated. "Besides, if he does not intend to move back then it might be that he was unconcerned so long as you did not make an utter fool of yourself, and thus him by extension."

"I...dunno. We'll see." Jazz said and just then Starblaze touched the ground, carefully setting him down. Jazz shuddered when he stood on his pedes and tried to take a step forward, only to feel his legs like liquid metal and crumbled to the ground, dizzy. "Wow."

Starblaze gave a dramatic sigh that was more for show than in truth and bent down to pick Jazz up once more. "Alright. I suppose I will be carrying you back."

"I'm fine, my gyros just need to remember I'm on the ground." Jazz chuckled. "My legs are like rubber right now!"

"And they can do that just as easily once I get you back to the room," Starblaze countered. He was already starting to walk and no amount of Jazz protesting would make him stop.

"Mechs are gonna stare at us." Jazz mumbled.

"As they surely did while you were calling yourself Ricochet. Did it not bother you then?"

"But Ricochet didn't exist. He was made up. No one knew him - he had no one close to worry about bringing shame to." Jazz explain. "His main reason to exist."

“And just how would this shame you?” Starblaze asked. “Because you needed assistance with something?”

"...Good point." Jazz said quietly.

They resumed the rest of the walk in comfortable silence and Jazz had almost dozed off at one point. There were apparently in the elevator when Jazz suddenly became much more awake.

His comm was ringing. And the ID on it was none other than his mate. Prowl.

::Prowl! Love!:: Jazz answered without even thinking.

Primus, he /missed/ his voice.

::Jazz!:: There was both shock and relief in the Praxian's tone. ::Primus! I was beginning to worry something horrible had happened to you when you didn't answer me the last few orn. Are you alright? Did something happen?::

::....You tried to call the last several orn?:: Jazz asked, shocked and guilt ridden. ::Oh, /love/. I'm so-so sorry.:: Jazz made wiggling motions for the other to let him go when the elevator reached their level. ::Yes, I'm fine. I'm totally fine. Please don't worry. Are /you/ alright? My works doesn't allow comm chatter and I always forget to turn it on...:: Primus, Jazz hated himself in that moment so much.

::I'm glad to hear that.:: The smile was practically palpable in Prowl's voice and it remained there as he continued speaking. ::I have been missing you greatly but I have wonderful news. The medics say I am doing remarkably well and if I continue to recover at this speed then I might be allowed to leave by the end of next week! Now, I know it's only about a week's difference and they do want me to rest for a few more weeks but it still means I might be able to return home sooner than we expected.::

"Oh my Primus, that's wonderful news! YES! Oh love! I can't wait to see you!:: Jazz explained, happy. ::I'm so thrilled you're doing alright. I long to see you so, so much! The last time I saw you--:: Jazz cut himself off. ::Just...just get better, love. For me. Please look after yourself there, make sure to fuel and listen to the medics.::

::I know and I will:: Prowl promised. ::I just wanted to share the good news with you as soon as I could and then when you didn't answer I got incredibly worried over you. I am glad you are doing well however. I know now that you must have been terribly worried over me. Hopefully, you have not been working too hard since I left.::

::Everything's fine... I'm fine.:: Jazz whispered as he stared at the hotel room, feeling like the world's biggest whore. ::But everything will be alright once you come home. I promise I'll answer the next time you call. You can comm me any time, even during the night. Just get better, love. I miss you terribly, you have no idea.::

::If it is half as much as I miss you, then I have some idea. I love you, my dear Jazz. I cannot wait to see you once more.::  
  
"Why are you stalling?" Starblaze questioned. He was standing behind Jazz, waiting for him to enter the suite.

::Take care and call me when you can, okay?:: Jazz asked, longing clear in his voice.  
  
"I'm talking with Prowl, just a moment." Jazz answered the seeker.

::Of course, love. I cannot wait to see you.::  
  
Starblaze frowned and his wings moved in a very similar manner to Prowl's in irritation but he said nothing.

Jazz ended the call after a few more words with Prowl and sighed, slumping for a moment before looked at Starblaze. "You /have/ to stop the comms block. We've established I wont call anyone or leave. But Prowl's been trying to call me." His spark hurt at the thought of his not being able to contact him. "And he can't while I'm in the room - he was really worried. I already feel guilty and like the biggest whore on this planet. He deserves to have his comms answered."

Starblaze's frown didn't leave but he did take on an air of consideration. He didn't say anything as he ushered Jazz inside though, not until the door had closed. Then he pressed a section of the wall and a hidden panel moved to reveal an intercomm system. Starblaze typed on it and let it close up again before turning back to Jazz.  
  
"I suppose that is a fair enough request. We do have a contract if you try anything and involving the enforcers would result in your whole torrid story becoming public. I highly doubt you want that."

"...I won’t." Jazz whispered as he went to sit on the berth. "...Uhm, about the contract. What...what do I have to do, to end it one week earlier?" He asked carefully.

"And just why should I agree to that?" Starblaze asked.

"...Prowl said they are releasing him early." Jazz answered. "One week earlier than we all expected. He's going to come home and discover I'm not there and I wanted...I wanted to give myself some time with him before I admitted everything to him...."

"Well that is unexpected," the Seeker commented and his wings twitched a bit. "Also highly unfortunate. I suppose I shall consider your request and give you an answer later."

"Thank you." Was all Jazz could say. "/Thank you/."

* * *

  
The orns literally blurred for Jazz.   
  
The visored mech couldn't tell when one orn began and or when would it end - he never knew which cubes were spiked and he stopped paying attention. He just knew he recharged. He recharged /a lot/ and the time he wasn't in recharge he felt drowsy from all the recharging he had been doing.  
  
It was both a good and bad thing - it was good because time suddenly started passing much, much faster and before he knew it, Prowl would be home in a few orn. It was bad for that same reason - Prowl would be home soon and Starblaze still hadn't given him his answer. The contract remained the same.  
  
And Jazz needed to be home one week earlier.  
  
"...Starblaze." Jazz said, rubbing his head to try and clear it. "You're stalling." He muttered, trying not to get upset. "C'mon, it's been orns."

"What am I stalling on?" Starblaze questioned. There was even innocence in his tone.

"I asked you if you could edit the contract. Prowl's coming home in a few orns. I...I need to be there. I ..." Jazz said up, looking at him sadly. "Please."

"Why would he need you there so badly? I thought you said he was healed already."

"Starblaze, we haven't seen each other since he left a month ago. And before that, he wasn't even Prowl! He was almost dead! Practically a living corpse in my home. Do you have any idea how difficult that was for me? I finally... I finally get to have him back. C'mon, it's just a week. Have a spark, please."

Starblaze was silent but his wings spread into a vaguely intimidating position. His field was tight against his frame and his expression was considerably displeased.

Jazz saw that and swallowed. It's not like he had any dignity left. He stood up and wobbled his way to the other, reaching for his hands.  
  
"...What do you want? Maybe you can interface with me while I'm awake?" Jazz suggested. "I'll be tied up. I'll won't touch."

"I already told you that I don't like my partners to be online," Starblaze told him in a soft voice.

"...Then I don't know what else to offer you." Jazz whispered, broken. "Alright. Then...give me one orn? Give me one orn to be with him and... and tell him about our situation. About the deal. You'll have me for the rest of the week."

“I thought you were not going to immediately tell him what you had done for him?”

"I don't want to do it, but what other choice are you giving me?" Jazz asked, sad.

“Do you even know for sure that tour lover will be back so soon or is he still guessing?”

"He gave me an exact date. He's coming back." Jazz said quietly.

“I see.” Starblaze simply stared at Jazz for a while. “And just what is that date?”

"Three orns from now." Jazz told him, uncertain.

“I see,” Starblaze replied. He didn’t move for a moment and then he dug into his subspace and pulled something out. He stared at it for a moment before tossing it to Jazz. “I am giving you this now but on your honor, you will stay here the next two orn. However, you may leave that night so you can get your place ready.”

"Oh, Starblaze, /thank you/!" Jazz reached out and hugged the other without thinking. "Thank you so much!"

“Careful!” Starblaze called out as Jazz practically fell on him. Then he sighed. “You are really out of it, aren’t you? I suppose I should use something else if we interface before you leave of your lover will know something is wrong with you. Pit, anyone would notice there is something wrong with you.”  
  
Starblaze didn’t wait for a reply and scooped Jazz up to carry him to the berth.

"S'just making me drowsy." Jazz mumbled, pretty much used to being mech-handled by the seeker all of the time. "I'll be okay... Starblaze, will you lay down too? I wanna tell you a couple of things..."

Starblaze gave a dramatic sigh but obliged Jazz. “I suppose that is nothing more interesting for me to be doing currently.”

Jazz gave a weak chuckle and allowed himself something he hadn't done before - he snuggled up with the other.  
  
"Look...I know things didn't turn out how you wanted. Or how I wanted... But I want you to know that I am grateful, because you have to realize - you saved two mechs. You really did save two mechs. I don't know what I would've done with myself if Prowl had died." Jazz's voice hitched for a moment. "I am lucky to have met you. Also...I...I was thinking about not telling Prowl about /you/. I will tell him about my 'seeker client' with the kink. But I won’t tell him it was you. So...I take my words back. If you ever happen to visit Iacon again...you can always call. For a social visit. No interfacing that time."

Starblaze sighed and this time it felt real. “Truth be told, interacting with you has been far more interesting than the interfacing. The biggest shame in your lover returning is that I shall have no one to occupy my time with once more.”

"Starblaze, I'm a firm believer in love... I believe you will find the one mech that will steal your spark. And maybe even like to be drugged. Who knows?" Jazz said gently. "I really wish to introduce you two some orn...given we're still together. He deserves better. Though, I don't know what I'll do with myself if we ever break up.

“I would offer you a home in Vos but you seem determined to suffer for what you did,” Starblaze commented.

"I don't get it. You're a great mech. Yeah, sure manipulative and deceiving and kinda domineering. But still a great mech." Jazz couldn't help but snicker. "You will find someone. I just know it."

“Sure,” Starblaze haphazardly agreed, “Some eventual orn…”

"Some orn..." Jazz trailed off, not even feeling himself slip offline.

* * *

"Did you put an aphrodisiac in the cube or something'?" Jazz had barely finished the energon cube when he registered how hot he was. He was sitting on the berth as he started to breathe from his mouth, trying to expel more heat. For some reason the rest of his vents didn't seem to work.

“Not specifically, although this mixture does have some to account for the reduced potency of the sedative,” Starblaze commented. “Why do you ask? You have never cared what I gave you before.”

"You gave me aphrodisiacs?!" Jazz gasped, but not so much for the question but for the fact that his frame was very close to overheating. "I-I...I think I'm gonna be sick." Jazz pressed his hands to his mouth.

“Only this time,” Starblaze offered. “And only because it was part of the mixture. Here.”  
  
He pulled a bottle out of his subspace and offered it to Jazz. Marked on the label were several ingredients with their uses. Those were, in order; a sedative, an aphrodisiac and a paralyzing agent.

Jazz took the item and read...  
  
"Starblaze, it says it th-the paralyzing agent has yttrium. I'm-" Jazz gasped, "I'm allergic to yttrium!"

Starblaze’s wings shot up. “How was I to know that? You never mentioned that you were allergic to anything!”

"Because yttrium is almost never put into anything edible!" Jazz protested, short of breath as another wave of nausea hit him. He suddenly ran to the wash racks, purging in the last moment.

Starblaze didn’t know what to do and eventually numbly followed after Jazz to check on him.

After he finished purging Jazz took a couple of deep breaths, fighting the dizziness. "S'okay. S'okay... I just...gotta wait out the effects." After he said that, Jazz promptly purged again. "Uhg."

“How long does this sort of thing usually last?” Starblaze asked. His wings were quivering in worry.

"Haven't had an allergic reaction since I met Prowl." Jazz shuddered, trying not to purge again. "C-call a medic. I'll need a shot. Then I'll be good as---" He purged, groaning. "new."

Starblaze flicked his wings and opened his comm to send an emergency signal. Once that was done, he stepped into the room but stayed near the doorway.  
  
“Do I dare ask why meeting him changed that?”

"It didn't. P-Prowl just made sure to warn waiters or someone bringing us, uhg, food about it." Jazz dry heaved. "S'absurd. Yttrium is rarely put into anything cuz it's super expensive." Jazz glanced at the other. "...That's probably some high quality sedative you got there."

“Of course,” Starblaze replied. “If you use anything with too low of quality then it can have horrible and lingering side effects. I find no joy in the suffering of others.”

Just after he purged Jazz couldn't help but give a weak chuckle. "Ironic, isn't it?"  
  
Just then someone knocked on the door and Starblaze was quick to let him in, leading him over to Jazz. The medic didn't say anything Jazz didn't know about and gave him a shot Jazz most certainly didn't like.  
  
"He has to spend the night at the med center." The medic explained. "He ingested a large amount of the allergic agent. It will be best if we flush his systems before releasing him in case of a relapse."

“If you say so,” Starblaze accepted. “I would greatly prefer not to risk him offlining in my suite.”

"Alright."  
  
And that's how Jazz found himself in the hospital room, a couple of joors later, hooked up to an IV to help flush his systems faster.  
  
"...You didn't have to get me a private room. Do you know how expensive they are?" Jazz asked him tiredly.

“No more expensive than flying a mech halfway across the planet for surgery to reconstruct vital appendages,” Starblaze replied with a shrug. “And this situation was actually my fault.”

"Not really. I should have mention. It's just... literally the most absurd allergy on the planet." Jazz said, sighing. "...Are you okay?"

“Why wouldn’t I be okay?” The question came in a genuinely confused tone. “This is not an allergy that can be passed through interfacing, now can it?”

"Don't be absurd." Jazz gave a small chuckle. "I just... you had other plans for our last two nights. Sorry for ruining one of them."

“It doesn’t matter. I don’t generally interface as much as I have now but there is something I greatly enjoyed about your presence. Do you desire for me to leave?”

"No." Jazz said quietly without thinking. "You still have two orns of me." He hesitated. "Do you have a family or ...someone to return to Vos to?"

“Vos is incredibly communal so there are always bots around. It is part of why this trip was nice, as it is so hard to be truly alone while in the city.”

"Soon you'll be back there." Jazz commented gently. "And you can always come back and visit."

“I suppose so,” Starblaze commented absently.

Jazz stared at him before sighing. "Alright. Come here. We're in a private room so we may as well take advantage of it. Lay down next to me before I fall in recharge."

Starblaze didn’t say anything as he walked to the medberth but he did tease Jazz once he laid down beside him. “You sure like to be bossy.“

Jazz couldn't help but chuckle. "It is fun." He murmured, sleepy.

“Well you should probably recharge now,” Starblaze said. “Medic’s orders.”

"Now who's trying to be bossy..." Jazz mumbled, listening to the other's words and falling in recharge.

* * *

It was early in the orn and Jazz was waiting on his medic to arrive and check him over so he could be cleared when it happened. His comm buzzed and he answered it easily before registering that it was Prowl’s frequency. He didn’t get a chance to talk though as Prowl spoke the moment he answered.  
  
::Jazz! Love, where are you? I thought you would be at home. You don’t usually work this orn.::

Jazz...felt faint.  
  
::Prowl?! You're home?:: Jazz practically jumped from the berth. ::You're /home/, here in Iacon?!:: He asked, shocked. So many thoughts and emotions passed through his helm that Jazz wondered how he didn't crash on that spot.

::I am:: the Praxian admitted. ::I know I told you I got to leave tomorrow but I wanted to surprise you. I suppose I should have said something though seeing as you are not even home now…::  
  
Prowl waited a moment but before Jazz could speak, he continued. ::Where are you, love? I can meet you if you are not busy?::

::Oh my sweet mate.:: Jazz almost allowed himself to cry. ::I'm...I'm at the hospital, visiting a friend.:: Jazz turned to look at Starblaze, stricken. ::Oh love, I wanted so much to be home for you when you came. I...I'm so, so sorry I wasn't there.:: And there they were, the tears started. ::I /long/ to see you but it won't...be appropriate for you to come. Oh love. I'm so, so sorry. I love your surprise - you made my orn so happy! I'll be home tonight. Is... is that alright?::

::Can I meet you there when you are done with your visit?:: Prowl asked. ::We could go out to that place you like and have a nice meal together too?::

::I...Love, I think we should stay in tonight. I don't think... I don't know how I'll react when I see you.:: Jazz whispered honestly. ::I'll be home tonight as fast as I can. I promise.::

::I see. I suppose I will see you when you get home then.:: Prowl’s tone had deflated but there was still some warmth in it. ::I love you, my Jazz.::

::I swear I'll try to get home as soon as I can. I can barely wait. I love you too, Prowler.::  
  
With that the line went dead and Jazz was on Starblaze in klicks. "You have to let me go home! I'm begging you! Prowl's home and he sounded sad that I wasn't there, oh Starblaze, please, please, please! This is why I wanted to be there when he gone home, please!" He cried, frantic.

“Calm,” Starblaze told him. “I am not the reason you cannot leave the medcenter. Your medic is the only one who can have you released currently.”

"No, I mean after that! I...I've been waiting for so long for this moment. B-But I promised I would be with you.... Oh Starblaze!" Jazz gripped his helm, panicking.

Starblaze sighed and flicked his wings. “Have I tried to keep you from your mate yet? Have I not done every single possible thing to allow you two to be together?”

"Yes, I just..." Jazz shook his helm. "...I promised you." He whispered. "But Prowler..."  
  
Just then the medic chose to walk in. "Oh, am I interrupting something?"  
  
Jazz quickly righted himself, brushing his face. "No...No. Everything fine. Am I free to go now?"  
  
The medic smiled. "Yes, you are. Your systems are fully flushed. Just make sure to be more careful next time."  
  
Jazz nodded and with that they were left alone. "....I'm afraid I'm hurting you by leaving do abruptly."

“You were always going to return to your mate and we both knew it,” Starblaze commented. “There is no reason to be hurt by you doing so an orn sooner than expected.”

Jazz nodded and shuttered his visor for a moment before he hugged Starblaze.  
  
"...I have to go now. Thank you, Starblaze. Thanks to you I have a mate to return to." Jazz whispered, squeezing him. "I'll call you when things are not so hectic, okay? And call me when you get home to Vos so I know your trip was safe."

“Sure,” Starblaze replied casually. “Take care yourself. You’re the one with worse luck.”

Jazz nodded, smiling gently at him and gave him a small peck on the cheek.  
  
"I know this isn't how your last night with me wanted to go. But... thank you." Jazz said. "Take care as well, Blazer."

Starblaze watched as Jazz left the room to return to his mate and then left the room and medcenter himself soon after.  
  


* * *

  
Jazz practically raced the streers towards his home. His home in which he hadn't been there in a month. His home where his mate was waiting for him.  
  
Prowl was waiting for him. Because he was alive. And well.  
  
Primus. Prowl was well.  
  
"Prowl!" Jazz practically burst the door open to their apartment, not caring that he was shouting. "Prowler!"

“Jazz?” The shout came from the back of the apartment, towards the berthroom. “You’re home?”

Jazz almost screamed at hearing Prowl's voice, live. "Yes! I managed to get home early!" Jazz practically ran towards the berth room, almost tripping on his pedes as he opened the door.

The berthroom was empty but the door to the washracks was closed. Prowl’s voice came through the door over the sound of running water. “I’ll be out soon. I’m nearly done.”

But Jazz just heard the other's voice coming from the washracks and ran there. He burst the door open and froze when he saw his mate. His perfect, gorgeous mate and a set of two stunning door-wings on his back.  
  
"...I couldn't wait." Jazz spoke, stunned and unable to process what he was seeing.   
  
Prowl. Alive and well.

Prowl turned as he heard Jazz and the shower washed away the last of the soap bubbles from his frame. “Jazz…”

Jazz probably tried to take a step forward or something that made him move but his legs suddenly couldn't hold on to his weigh and he fell to his knees, just /staring/ at the other, drinking in the sight. He also tried to say something but no word other than static came out and Jazz pressed his hands to his mouth, feeling the tears slide down his face, frame shaking.

That left Prowl as the one who had to move forward, stepping out of the water to meet his mate. There were trails of water still running down his frame and drops falling from his armor as he walked. “Jazz?” His tone was worried as he dropped to his knees. “Love? What’s wrong?”

But Jazz couldn't answer. He shook his helm as his cries grew and he sobbed on the floor, burying his face in his hands.

::I thought this orn would never come. I-I thought I lost you.:: Jazz said over comms. It was impossible for him to speak outloud. ::You were /dying/ before my optics, in my hands. You... you wanted to die. And all I wanted to do was die there with you. And now you're here. And whole. And /alive/...:: Jazz trailed off as even the comms became difficult.

Prowl pulled Jazz against him and held him close. “I understand, love. It was a trying time but we got through it and things are better now. May Primus grant that we never need to worry about such things again.”

Jazz wrapped his hands around Prowl, squeezing and burying his face in the other's plating. He held him close as he gathered himself before he pulled back slightly to give Prowl a hopeful smile.  
"...T-they are so big!" Jazz managed to choke out, "They are stunning, love!"

“This is the latest style,” Prowl commented. “They are not much larger than my previous pair though, and certainly not enough to make a noticeable difference to my sensory intake.”

"I am so, so glad you're okay and they are /perfect/. So perfect. Just like you." Jazz laughed through the tears, happy. "Oh Prowl..." He squeezed him again. "This isn't a dream, is it? I won't wake up?" He reached to touch one but his hand hovered next to the appendage.

Prowl chuckled. “You can touch but I will be extra sensitive to all sorts of stimuli for a while, especially right now, so if you do so then we not be talking much more.”

And just then Jazz felt a lot more dirty. He pulled his hand from the door wing to brush his face from the tears and allowed himself to be selfish. He cupped Prowl's face and brought their lips together, feeling more tears pool behind the visor.  
  
"Oh love." Jazz mumbled against the other's lips. "I'm so happy, I can't stop crying."

Prowl kissed him back with all the love and affection he could muster and had been unable to share the past month. “I am just so glad everything is back to normal again. I am finally whole and healthy and back home with my adoring and wonderful mate. Life is just perfect now.”

"It really is." Jazz whispered, stealing more kisses form him, allowing to lose himself in the moment but then the guilt became unbearable. He pulled back, still cupping the other's face. "How are you now? Did you fuel? Do you want me to get you a cube? Anything?"

“Energon would be lovely. I had some before leaving but then I came immediately home after we arrived in Iacon and did not think of it before I showered.”

"Okay. Then... then let's go out! I haven't shopped in a while." Because he didn't live here, "And we're all out but we can do it maybe together? And just walk around and hold hands and just... Oh Prowl, I love you. I'm so, so happy you're here. I don't know if I'll be able to leave you alone even for just a few breems now that I have you back."

“But you said before that you wanted us to stay in,” Prowl said and there was questioning and concern in his tone.

"Because I forgot we didn't have anything here." Jazz said, hugging the other. "I just... I want us to do what you want. I want us to celebrate! It'll just take a little longer for me to prepare the energon and I don't want you to...to wait hungry. I saw enough of you like that."

He explained gently. "...I'm seriously fighting the urge to stuff you full with goodies and energon."

“I thought you said there was nothing here,” Prowl questioned but his wings were tilted to show he was teasing.

"I mean we can go shopping together!" Jazz said, laughing and unable to let go of the other. "To a grocery store. I'll get you /anything/ you want. My one condition – just don't let go of my hand."

Prowl chuckled again. “Well that’s good then, although all I truly want is you.”

He then tugged Jazz closer for another kiss.

Jazz easily gave in into the kiss, moaning softly as he squeezed the other. He didn't even feel himself as he literally crawled in Prowl's lap, hungry for his touches and kisses.

Things Prowl easily gave him. They traded both light and heated kisses back and forth as their hands moved across one another’s plating, remapping long familiar forms. It was when Jazz absently touched Prowl’s wing that the Praxian pulled back though. “Tell me, love. Do you truly want us to go to the store? Because I am craving you far more than I am energon.”

Jazz gave a sad laugh as he pulled back to stare at the other. "...So do I. So do I love, but... it will not be fair to you if we do this. I just...once I started kissing you I couldn't stop."

“The only unfair aspect is you not letting me enjoy my mate thoroughly.” Prowl’s good mood had returned and he was smiling at Jazz as he teased him. Prowl’s new wings were even fluttering in happiness.

Primus. Screw it.  
  
"... Alright." Jazz whispered. "...Make me forget this even happened. /Please/?" The need was clear in his field.

Prowl’s wings flicked a happy affirmative before his vocalizer could even online and he shifted as he spoke. “Shall we move to the berthroom where we will be more comfortable?”  
  
Prowl even offered a hand to Jazz to help him up.

Jazz stared at the hand and felt like he had died and gone to heaven.  
  
He took the hand. It was impossible not to.  
  
And if this was a dream, Jazz thought as he was led to the berth room, he wished he died in it, so he would never get to wake up.

* * *

  
Ever since Prowl came back Jazz had barely left the Praxian's side. It was both the need to be next to him, drinking in his sight and field and his touch and at the same time fearing at each caress or kiss or sweet word would be the one because the guilt inside Jazz was eating him slowly.  
  
Jazz didn't plan to interface with Prowl. He feared he would stain him but...it was impossible not to. Since Prowl's first orn back, it was impossible to keep his hands off the Praxian. And Jazz was so insanely, stupidly happy that he never found the strength or right time to tell Prowl. His mate was just so happy that they get a second chance at this and Jazz...Jazz would be the one to destroy it.  
  
But then one orn a mild discomfort presented itself in his interface equipment and suddenly a very real fear presented itself.  
  
Primus...what if he had caught something from one of his clients?! Starblaze was clean but he wasn't so sure about the rest!   
  
The horror quickly became panic and Jazz knew that this was it - he /had/ to tell Prowl because /both/ of them had to get tested. He might even need to call Startblaze. Primus, the humiliation...  
  
That orn Jazz needed a long time to gather the courage (and to stop crying) to go to Prowl. The Praxian was in the berthroom, reading a pad. He had spoken with the Chief Enforcer and there was a big possibility he could get his previous job back without losing rank or being sent back to the Academy. His mate was just so happy that Jazz knew he was going to ruin his life. Again.  
  
"...Hey, Prowler." Jazz said softly as he climbed the berth to sit next to the Praxian. "...We...we gotta talk. There's something I've been meaning to tell you but I..." His voice faded in static. "I just couldn't because I'm too ashamed. That, and the fact that you will hate me."

“How could I ever hate you, my love?” Prowl asked. His wings did tilt in concern though. “Please talk to me. What happened?”

Jazz felt his frame start to shake as he resumed talking. "...I hate myself for what I did so, so much. But... it was... I thought it was our only option. You weren't fueling Prowler. You were turning _gray_. And begging me to let you die." Jazz started crying. "I thought I could pretend nothing happened, give ourselves a few more weeks before I had to come forward. But I..." Jazz shuddered, hugging himself. "...I just want you to know that I love you. And I will understand if you don’t forgive me. Either way I won’t forgive myself..."

Prowl pulled Jazz close and hugged him tight. “What could you possibly have done that is so bad?”

Jazz allowed himself to hug Prowl back, squeezing hard before pulling away. He gave a chocked laugh. "Right," He cleared his throat. "So, anyway... things were bad. Things were ... _very bad_. You were..." Jazz shuddered. "You were practically gray. I worked triple shifts, I sold almost all of our stuff, thus the bare apartment you see here, Pit, I even sold my energon on a black market!" Jazz's laugh was stronger this time but just as dark. "But it /still/ wasn't enough." He said brokenly. "You needed new wings. And I... I ran out of things to sell and no honorable job could ever pay enough to give you door-wings before the vorn ends." He reached into his subspace and brought out the data pad where he kept records of his 'other' work. "...So I had to get a dishonorable one. Meet... Meet Ricochet, love." he handed him the pad. "A low-life prostitute who would do anything for some extra credits."

Prowl accepted the pad and began looking through it. His expression remained steady but unreadable as he went and even his field was empty. Eventually, he looked up again. “Love…”

"...One of Ricochet's clients... A... a seeker. He took a liking to him." Jazz went on, feeling his frame go numb. "...In exchange for being his personal pleasurebot for one month, he became the 'generous benefactor' for your miraculous recovery." Jazz felt his breath hitch as his cries grew. "And during your stay in Praxus, he stayed with him. Even when you returned, he was still with him, as his last client." Jazz chocked. "...I didn't know how to tell you."

“I see…”

Prowl stayed silent and still for a few kliks before finally speaking. “So you did this because of me…”

"... You were dying." Jazz whispered, crying. "You don't know how it feels like to watch the mech you love die and being powerless to do anything. No bank was agreeing to lend us money. And our friends didn’t have that much and I-I didn't know what else to do. And I'm too selfish to let you die!" Jazz trembled. "I know, I know I don't deserve us, but please, please forgive me. I had to do it! I'm sorry for not telling you sooner, I didn't know how. I just...I'm so, so sorry..."

Prowl looked away. “Jazz… I am so sorry…”

Jazz expected a lot of thing. Prowl yelling. Or throwing him out. Or even hitting him. But Prowl apologizing...? That was not something Jazz expected. Ever.

He blinked through the tears, confused. "...I don’t understand. I'm the one that cheated on you so horribly and repeatedly..."

“Because I was careless,” Prowl explained. His wings were low and quivering. “You did this because of me. That makes it my fault.”

"No, love, please." Jazz hurried to shift closer to the other, he reached but barely stopped himself from touching. "I'm begging you not to say that. Just...." Jazz shuddered. He gave Prowl the other pad, the one with the contract. "Here is the contract with the seeker. It...it wasn’t...horrible. I didn't... I didn't have to do anything. He just wanted my frame - I wasn't even awake! He had an odd kink. I just took a sedative and that's it. It was a miracle. If that hadn't happened, you would still be here, in pain and agony. Just..." Jazz felt himself shake. "If-if you find it in your spark to forgive me, I want us to move on. I had to tell you because you deserve someone pure. Not... not a whore."

“There is nothing for me to forgive,” Prowl said. He couldn’t look at Jazz though. “I am the one who should be seeking forgiveness. I failed and you suffered for it.”

"...Just how did you fail me? You didn't! You are so strong, even the medics think that! Any normal mech would've lost their mind by now but not you! If I have to I would do it all again! You are priceless to me. There is /nothing/ I won’t do for you, even sell my soul to the unmaker himself." Jazz argued, finally reaching to touch the other. "Please look at me, love."

“And that is the problem,” Prowl said. “You did all of that for me but if I had been better then you would not have had to suffer. This is all my fault.”

"For someone logical you sure are being illogical now!" Jazz argued, upset. "Love, did you /want/ to lose your door-wings? No! Did you lost them on purpose? No! None of this is your fault! Please, please don't say or think that! I'll feel even worse knowing I'm making you suffer again! A-and I would've postponed telling you if-if...." Jazz shuddered, looking down, "...if your whore of a mate didn't think he has a std..."

“It was still my own mistake that got me injured. If I hadn’t miscalculated- wait, what?” Prowl went from arguing to confused in moments once he processed what Jazz had said. His wings twitched in concern as he continued. “How is that possible? Are you sure? Weren’t you getting checked out?”

"I was!" Jazz felt his cheeks burn, humiliation flooding his field. "Almost every week! And I was fine while I was with the seeker. I dunno why all of a sudden I feel this...discomfort in my interface equipment." He couldn't look away. "It could be noting. Or it could be something... disgusting."

“When did you start feeling this way?” Prowl asked, immediately switching into a concerned mode. “Have you made an appointment to see a medic yet?”

"...this morning. I... would've avoided telling you this whole thing but if I did caught something I didn't want you to..." Jazz trailed off, sad. "I usually go to the free clinic. I was thinking about going this orn." he said softly before looking away. "...should I move out?" He whispered.

Prowl’s expression became stricken. “You are going to leave me over this?”

"NO!" Jazz yelled, suddenly terrified, "But I know you probably want me to pack up my things and leave! You don't need a whore in your life! Someone disgusting, probably with a std... I don't want to leave, i want to spend the rest my life with toy but Prowler... don't you see? You deserve someone so much better than me...."

“How could I possibly deserve someone better when I am the reason you had to suffer!”

"Because you aren't!" Jazz protested. "You are not Prowl! Okay? Stop saying that!"

“Except I am,” Prowl countered. “If you didn’t know me then you wouldn’t have cared I got injured. If I hadn’t gotten injured then you never would have done that. If I had bothered to have credits saved up or looked into the insurance in better detail then I could have gotten my surgery sooner. There are a million reasons why this is my fault.”

"If you don't _SHUT UP RIGHT NOW_ I will start crying!" Jazz yelled at him.

Prowl chanced a glance at Jazz but looked away again and his wings sank further. "It is true though..." he muttered under his breath.

"But I don't see or feel it that way... Prowl..." Jazz whimpered, shamelessly using this card even if he wasn’t faking it. "I need you..."

"How can you not fault me?" Prowl asked. "I want you too but if I can drive you to such extremes...."

"I can't fault you for something you had no control over. And my actions are my own - I take responsibility for them. No one else. I just...." Jazz whispered. "Oh Prowl... I just love you so much..."

"I love you too, my beautiful and perfect Jazz. I just can't stand the fact that you had to hurt due to me..."

"I hurt when you hurt." Jazz said sadly. "Always. I just wanted you back, happy and whole...."

"But if I hadn't been hurt..." Prowl protested.

"That doesn’t matter anymore. Are you telling me you won’t go to extremes for me? I know you Prowler, I know you will.... Please stop."

Prowl gave a soft sigh and flicked his wings. “I suppose…”

Jazz shifted closer, daring himself to hug him. "I need you..."

“I need you too,” Prowl murmured as he hugged Jazz tightly against himself. “Please don’t leave me. I don’t know what I would do without you.”

"I swear I won't leave you unless you tell me." Jazz squeezed him back, burying his face in his plating. "I just...aren't you disappointed in me? And disgusted? I...I am. I regret not telling you the first orn because now you've been with me. I just... Prowl, I'm stained."

Prowl tipped his own helm down and pressed a gentle kiss to the top of Jazz's helm. "Because you were trying to help me. Because I failed and made the wrong choice. I cannot fault you for something that was caused by my own error."

"...No one touched my spark." Jazz swore quietly. "Many wanted but I never allowed them. I... I couldn't. It's yours only and no one else’s." Jazz murmured, hugging the other close.

Prowl hugged Jazz tight too. He couldn't find the words to say anything though so he was silent. Need and love and desperation surrounded them in their mingled fields but there was also a small flare of hope.  
  
They were together and they had one another and things would hopefully get better from here.  
~  
"Oh Prowl, you're going to like Starblaze so much! You two are more alike than you even think!" Jazz said as he held Prowl's hand and hurried down the street. "It's about time you two meet!"

"So you have said, love," Prowl commented with amusement in his tone. Jazz was trying to drag him too fast for his wings to move other than for balance or they too would have been tilted in amusement.

"It's been _vorns_ since I saw him. I'm just excited." Jazz chuckled as they neared the little cafe. "Oh look! He's already inside!" He motioned at the seeker. "Let's go." And dragged Prowl inside.

Prowl followed readily, although he did not get much of a choice in the matter, and soon they were standing in front of a mech who was not far taller than he but most certainly larger. Even the other's wings far outsized his own. Not to be deterred, however, Prowl straightened his stance the extra bit it did not need and moved hi swings in the closest approximation he could both recall and manage of a Vosnian greeting.  
  
Starblaze gave back a similar attempted greeting in the Praxian style but both mechs remained silent as they waited for Jazz to introduce them verbally.

Jazz was the one to break formality (not that he even attempted to try it) and finally let go of Prowl in order to suddenly hug the seeker.  
  
"Starblaze!" Jazz squeezed him. "About time you came to Iacon! I'm so glad you came!" Jazz grinned up at him before shifting and motioning at Prowl. "This is my mate, Prowl. Love, that's Starblaze."

Prowl gave a small nod to the seeker who was, in turn, the one to speak. "It is nice to finally meet the mech he constantly went on about while I was last visiting. It is a shame that our schedules never matched up until now."  
  
"He has mentioned you often as well," Prowl shared. "I do believe you might be the friend he is most fond of."

"Am I now?" Starblaze asked as he glanced at Jazz surprised.   
  
"Perhaps." Jazz grinned at them as they sat down at the table.   
  
"You're certainly smiling a lot more than the last time I saw you." Starblaze observed.   
  
"Cuz I have my Prowler with me." Jazz explained. "I can’t not smile when he's with me."

"Jazz is a highly affectionate bot," Prowl commented as he joined said mech at the table. "In case you have somehow not yet noticed."

Jazz gave his mate a playful glare.  
  
"So I have." Starblaze said, "So how are you? Are the new door-wings integrated well?"

"Wonderfully so." Said appendages fluttered slightly as Prowl's focus shifted to them. "My medic was amazed at how quickly I re-acclimated to the temporary ones and brought in a few other medics to witness my recovery. That entire team was in awe of how well I adjusted and how slight my mental deterioration had been given how long I had gone without."

"Told you Prowl was strong." Jazz said to Starblaze, smiling at his mate. "If anyone can overcome this, it's him. Just then the waiter came and took their order before leaving the three mechs on their own.  
  
"So, anyway, anything interesting with you 'Blazer?" Jazz asked, curious. "Found someone?"

"Now why would you ask a thing like that?" Starblaze questioned back. "Don't you recall that I had no interest in a permanent partner when we were last together?"

"Primus, that was so long ago! You could've changed your mind." Jazz explained with a small huff. "I thought it was something like a phase."

“A phase that had thus far lasted my entire life?” Starblaze questioned in return. “An occasional companion is nice but I am still undecided for a permanent one.”

"As long as you're happy." Jazz said with a smile and they shifted into other topics of conversation.   
  
"Oh, Prowler! Starblaze lifted me up on his jets! I saw Iacon from up high!" Jazz said excitedly.

Prowl’s wings instinctively shot up in worry but he brought them back down. There was nothing that could change that fact now and Jazz was clearly safe.  
  
“Did he now?” questioned the Praxian. “That must have been exciting.”

"It was scary and awesome all at the same time." Jazz chuckled. "I've never been that high outside of a building. And a shuttle. But it was so different!"  
  
::Do you like Prowl so far?:: Jazz commed Starblaze.

“I’m sure it was,” Prowl agreed. Then he laughed and let his wings flutter with it in the way Jazz had always liked.  
  
Starblaze watched, amused, and took a moment to reply to Jazz. ::He is certainly not what I envisioned from his records but I do believe he cares for you considerably. You are lucky he accepted your dark secret.::

::...It was... Primus bless his spark, Starblaze, he blamed himself! Can you believe it? He blamed himself for something that /I/ did.:: Jazz said and took Prowl's hand in his own.

Prowl smiled and squeezed Jazz’s hand. It was a silent declaration of love. Starblaze did even notice it though, even as he watched it happen. He was too busy chewing over Jazz’s words. ::How could it have possibly been his fault? I highly doubt any mech in his condition would have been acting like your pimp.::

::See?! I tried to tell him that but he just wouldn't listen! It took me forever to get him to be over that.:: Jazz explained, field full of love for Prowl

::Crazy mechs, both of you:: Starblaze mused.  
  
Their private conversation ended and they all spoke for a while. Eventually though, the meal was drawing to a close and they were reaching goodbyes. It wasn’t too surprising when Starblaze’s comm beeped again, but it was unusual who had commed him. It was an unknown number but from nearby.  
  
::I want to thank you:: the mech said and it sounded like Prowl.

Starblaze replied after a short pause, more hesitantly. ::Thank me...? For what?::

::For everything, I suppose:: Prowl replied. ::For saving me in particular though.::

Surprise flared in him for a moment before Starblaze managed to control it. ::...He told you I sponsored you?::

::No:: Prowl replied. ::He only said a seeker client paid for my surgery but it was not too hard to piece together as you are the only seeker I know of him knowing.::

Starblaze flapped his door-wings uncertainly, commenting on something Jazz said out loud absently. ::...Then he must have told you the price for that. How are you alright with it? Your mate speaking with the seeker that demanded something intimate from him in exchange for your door-wings.::

::You could not be such a horrible mech if you were willing to spend so much on me. Besides, you could have kept him for longer or even stolen him away.:: Prowl caught his optic as he said something verbally that did not matter to those private conversation. ::You even let him out of the contract early. That is not the making of a horrible mech.::

::...I admit, I did not expect to receive a thank you from a Praxian for...spending time with his mate.:: Starblaze said, honestly thrown for a loop. ::...He is the first Polyhexian I met. I didn't believe they could be as gullible as I heard.:: The seeker paused. ::...You taught him well. It was his idea for the contract, not mine.::

::I do not know whether it was respect for him or for me because our cities are related, but you treated him well. Far better than the circumstances should have afforded him. I have to thank you for that as well.::

::...I do not feel comfortable for accepting those thanks.:: Starblaze explained, quietly. ::But even so. You're welcome. You take good care of him. I am glad.::

::He has helped and cared for me just as much.:: Prowl smiled fondly at Jazz before he spoke again. ::I know you said you were uninterested in finding a mate but hopefully you can find someone to make you just as happy some orn.::

::...Maybe. We shall see.:: Starblaze said as he looked from Prowl to Jazz. ::But if I do, I know I want to have what you two have.::

::I do not recommend anything else.::

::Good. I would want nothing less.::  
  
~

**Author's Note:**

> In most of our fics Starblaze is "bad", because he doesn't know how to be "good" - he doesn't believe he /can/ be good. Of course that doesn't excuse his actions or behavior, but it does shed light as to why he is the way he is. At the end of the day, you all have to decide for yourselves if you consider him good or bad - Skylar and I constantly have debated about that.  
> And he does have a unique control kink - in the fic he was created it very obvious as to why, but for now we'll leave it at that. However, right up with Starblaze, we created another OC of ours, who is the epitome of despicable and every time he enters one of our fics, leaves disaster. Thankfully, he didn't make an appearance here but one orn you will all have the honor to meet "him" as well, and his connection to Starblaze.
> 
> We are very curious about you reception of Starblaze and hope you enjoyed his debut ^_^
> 
> Photo commission of Starblaze by InMoNochrome: https://theparallelwall.tumblr.com/post/161043398552/so-his-name-is-starblaze-personality?fbclid=IwAR3zahV8IaxZXeiqS97ljnykcAWt_7u5qtA6LUE_tpv8K2JnSosS1y7sAD8


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